I baked my dad a cake for his birthday, but he is still mourning the passing of my mother. Can anyone offer some stories about losing a loved one or just some general words of encouragement?

by Kooky_Creme_3234

27 Comments

  1. Strength_Honor_81

    I don’t have words of encouragement, perhaps perspective. You lost your mother, but he lost the love of his life.

  2. Donut-Boxers

    dont try to make him feel better, simply allow him to grieve

  3. Limp_Championship869

    Well, I think your dad is very handsome, he clearly loves deeply, and he seems to have raised a child who cares about him very much. I think the best you can do is let him grieve, ensure he knows he’s loved, and keep him company.

  4. ApprehensiveRent4323

    So sorry for you and your father’s loss. I hope you can both find some peace in time. I see the grief as the evidence of how much he loved her

  5. BedHeadRedemption427

    I lost my mom the day before Christmas , my freshman year of college. Looking back on pictures in the year or so following her death, I looked just like your dad…. It’s an inner feeling that can only take time for the person to come to a place of feeling better. It’s never really better tho, but more of an adjusting to the reality and trying to move thru it.

    Just be present with him, hug him and sit back honestly. Im so sorry for you guys loss❤️

  6. GlitterBlood773

    It isn’t your job. His feelings are his to hold.

    Grief is the love with nowhere to go. You can’t untangle them. Let him feel his feelings. Be gentle to yourself & him in each of your grief.

  7. shutupsammy55678

    I’m sorry your family is going through this ❤️ I lost my mom a little after Christmas 2023. My dad still talks to her every day.

    Your mom is still here in spirit and still probably visits him daily. Sending love ❤️

  8. SqueegieeBeckenheim

    It’s going to take time. It’s still fresh. My mom passed this January and my dad acts similarly. Our dads are grieving and trying to figure out their new normal. Just be there for him and be present.

  9. Worried_Row2270

    .When my mother-in-law lost her husband, it was understandably very difficult for her. Remember, this is someone she had loved her whole life. It was a time of deep grief for her. Baking a birthday cake was a sweet and special gesture. If you live nearby, consider inviting him over for a meal on Sunday. Include him in family outings, and see if he might be interested in volunteering or joining a club later on. Ultimately, he will need to decide for herself when he’s ready to take those steps. All you can do in the meantime, is be there.

  10. ImpossibleEducator45

    He is a very handsome man, he reminds me of Sean Connery. Let him grieve, my daughter died in 24 and I am still deep in grief most days I do nothing. Just let him know you are always there for him, no matter how harsh or how strange his feelings are, accepting them is key. My mom is still grieving my dad deeply it’s been 15 years. Give home time and space, talk about your mom like she’s still with you. Ask him to do things maybe even go places that you went as a child. It may never go away but it will slowly get back to a point when you realize my loved one wouldn’t want me like this. I am still taking baby steps to get there

  11. GotYoGrapes

    Celebrate her life together. Go do things that remind you of her. Ask him to tell you stories about her. Visit her favourite places together.

    It won’t make the pain go away. But it might help him feel closer to her and help him begin to process and articulate his feelings.

    He might not be ready to do those things yet, though. Especially if this all happened super recently. Just give it time and go at his pace.

  12. OpalescentShrooms

    Just keep loving him and being there for him. Being sad is healthy. He should be allowed to grieve

  13. ASquareBanana

    Grief is like a tidal wave at first. All encompassing and chaotic and drowning. The wave hits you and you’re struck back, hard. It takes time and effort to stand back up and go about your day again, you might not even think you’ll survive the hit. But you do. And it’s not the last time you’ll be hit, but just the first.

    But with each hit, the wave gets smaller. And one day, you’ll be able to see the wave coming and prepare for it. It’ll still hit you, and you’ll get wet, but you’ll handle it much better than the first time it hit you. Until one day the wave doesn’t even knock you on your ass, the wave hits but somehow you’re still standing.

    Grief will always come back to hit you with that wave, but we get better at getting hit. We just have to put in the effort to get there.

    Much love to you and your dad 🫂

  14. Physical_Bee_7495

    He’s gone bro. Just let him be gone. It’s done

  15. Striking_Courage_822

    Look I’m not one to usually police this stuff, but seeing this photo and then reading the context felt intrusive. I don’t suggest posting photos on Reddit of someone in pain without their blessing. Wishing you both healing and happiness.

  16. stitchreverie

    Why is everyone falling for this weird ass AI photo

  17. KTKittentoes

    I mean, you can’t, truly. My dad deeply grieved my mom until he died. Just be with him, talk to him, suggest things to do but don’t be mad if he isn’t ready.

  18. This is a weird ass thing to post here ngl. Take your father’s pic down and just be with him. His photo and situation is now just on the internet. That’s literally not ok

  19. Itchy-Mechanic-1479

    He can now ski free in most American resorts.

  20. VermicelliBusy655

    This is so clearly AI! And people falling for this and trauma dumping all over this post is so infuriating. This is a baking sub! People really jump on any post to have the opportunity to tell their sob story.

  21. Repyourstruly

    This pic is unfortunately the harsh reality for most married folks. I rather have a go at life alone than leave my love behind…

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