i’m sure many here have been in this situation before. nobody in my kitchen really gaf about making good food or cooking or keeping track of shit. about typical and that in itself is fine. i am passionate about food and do my best to keep stuff organized. my coworker on the line is the same way. this is acknowledged a lot, as in the amount of work i do/efficiency, and my coworker too, and i’m not rude to people, if it’s busy i get quiet and focus. i don’t understand how it’s helpful to other people to start yellin and shoutin and being rude

(this section is vent-ish) i’m 20 and trans working with people who are all older than me. they rag on me a lot and get on my case for little things, not mistakes, like asking what ticket they’re working on. i understand it’s stressful but they don’t treat my coworker like that. once another cook watched my coworker put something up without calling it, then i came over and called my food, he starts going off on me about never calling shit. he’s kind of mean to me all day in a way that’s hard to pick up on/describe. he makes rude jokes about me all day. i’m quiet, im autistic (have only specifically brought up my auditory processing problems so far), i just want to do my job. i am naturally jovial and extroverted at work but im starting to feel worn down by all this

i don’t understand how people who like cooking don’t get exhausted coming in every day, putting passion into the food, and getting shit for it from people who don’t even care about it at the end of the day. i’m not gonna lie im fast and a good cook and i try, because i like the work, but it’s just food, nobody’s gonna die, so i really don’t get it. i want to cook i like the fast paced ness of it and making good food. i just don’t understand why cooks act like that.

by Famous-Bullfrog4760

38 Comments

  1. cynical-rationale

    I hated working with cooks like that. Many times I told them to fucking quit. Probably the one thing I hate the most is cooks who hate to cook and would rather bitch and whine. Get a new job.

    These people you deal with are just broke, depressed, and blame the world for their own shortcomings, won’t do anything to change their circumstance but follow the same routine and bitch and whine. Bring everyone else down to their level. Those kitchens are the ones I say is where cooks go to die haha as they’ll be there until retirement.

  2. flyingcircusdog

    Someone ordered an item from our menu at 6:30 pm? What an asshole!

  3. EnvironmentalPoet284

    It’s misplaced anger. They’re working a shitty job, getting paid a shitty wage, are forced to serve shitty customers, and work together with shitty coworkers. Unfortunately they probably have no prospects other than working fast food since they were 16, so this is the only job they can get.

  4. TunaHuntingLion

    It’s because there’s no profit sharing motive. If cooks made more or less money depending on how busy or slow it was, that attitude would, for all intents and purposes, disappear from the industry.

    At all jobs people get grumpy when they’re asked to do more work but not paid more for working harder during those hours. The restaurant industry can just really take that to an extreme by the difficulty and stress of the work being extremely hard during extra busy times.

    FOH doesn’t have that problem due to the tipped nature. Also, places with a strong tip pool culture also see it disappear for the back of house.

  5. Imagine working in 100° heat, shoulder to shoulder with a bunch of sweaty men, while being bombarded with random requests some of which makes absolutely no damn sense.

  6. VikingPower81

    You will find shit co workers in any profession.

    The only thing about kitchens is you’re working usually in a relative tight space, with a lot of people, a lot of “stress” and stuff to manage… Which is why staging even is a thing, regardless of how illegal it is.

    Find a new spot and **kick your coworker in the shin.**

    >
    i don’t understand how it’s helpful to other people to start yellin and shoutin 

    In 15 years, I have never encountered a single scenario where yelling and or shouting was in any sort of way productive.

    It does sound like you are working with menopausal men who habour some prejudice against trans and or autistic people.

  7. Cold-Chemistry1286

    You’re gonna do well. I have similar auditory processing issues and adhd myself, and as long as it’s not chaotic noisy kitchen business is very suited to my brain. You’re 20, and you care, and that’s gonna just rankle some old timers that don’t see it the same way you do. I hope you take your skills here and keep snowballing up towards better kitchens every opportunity you can. In your early twenties you shouldn’t be anywhere more than a year unless your position changes drastically and gives you access to new skills and challenges. You have a mindset that is going to serve you well if you choose to make this your career. Just keep your head down and I’m really sorry your coworkers seem to be singling you out for abuse. You’re gonna do great. I’ve got 20+ years in and I could have written almost this same post 19 years ago.

    Edit: in my career I’ve had the honor of being an incredibly small part of a James Beard Award and I’ve run four successful profitable kitchen programs in restaurants in my area. I work in athletic nutrition now and my restaurant years inform every aspect of my life. All the best.

  8. zazasfoot

    Hating on custies and FoH is every cook’s god given right, I’m pretty sure its even in the Bible.   Bourdain 12:35: “fuck these customers, fuck this job, but thou will not do anything else”

  9. Toadahtrip

    Look at these jerks showing up at 7pm to eat!!!

    We close at midnight.

  10. SmokedBeef

    Just wait till you graduate to a better kitchen and almost nothing changes, hell you could even find a more “enlightened” French/Austrian/German head chef and the only real difference will be that insults now come in a new language.

    Don’t get me wrong, there are definitely polite, nice, reserved kitchens out there where anger, insults and teasing rarely occur and everyone acts exceptionally professional but they are far less common and typically reserved for high end hotels and fine dining in my experience.

  11. SilverBraids

    I actively work with someone with this mentality. It’s draining af

  12. Mikaela24

    Get a new job and don’t tell them you’re trans, or autistic and you’ll be treated better. Unfortunately a lot of cooks are not so closeted bigots.

  13. WHO THE FUCK HAS THE DISGRACE TO ORDER A STEAK AT *checks watch* 7 GODDAMN PM!!!

  14. jellyfrisson

    In my opinion, a lot of that comes down to personality & support from management.

    What I loved about kitchen work was the steady, somewhat chaotic but also heckin’ organized flow-state of the job. I also went into it with the mentality of, tonight we’re going to do what we do every night, feed people, show them a good time, then close up. I consistently brought a borderline-annoyingly positive attitude to the kitchen. The only reason I’m not in the industry anymore is that working as a prep/line cook was not conducive to being present for my family.

    All that said, the majority of my colleagues were great. They wanted things to run smoothly, were invested in doing a good job because what’s the point, otherwise?

    There were assholes who did not care, were actively shitty to their colleagues, didn’t show for shifts, etc. They got canned quickly. One stand out was an older, “retired,” restaurant owner who was hired as another line/prep. He was always trying to do things his way, would try to cut pizza on my fish station, wanted to blare his bluetooth speaker in my face during service, but most of his BS was dealt with by telling him no.

    It sounds like the place you’re working may not be a great fit. I could be wrong! But, if you’re up for it, it’s not a terrible idea to put some resumes out elsewhere. No need to give notice unless you have something else. Life is too short to stay somewhere that makes you miserable.

    Best of luck to you. It can be a hard grind. But, if it’s what you want, you will find your happy place, eventually.

  15. Jalantepenlope

    I quit a job because I got stuck working brunch with a guy who always came in hungover and bitched and whined the whole shift. Every order that came in he would say “I hate brunch, I hate sundays” he also fucked up almost every order, came in before me and never had anything set up for the shift. So the whole shift would be playing catch up while getting slammed. This was my breaking point and I quit.

    One time he leaned over the service counter to put food in the window and squished a stuffed French Toast with his belly. Fucking had to remake that after a customer was already waiting 20 minutes for it. I really hated this guy.

    I told the kitchen manager he better find someone to cover my shift Sunday, cause I’m not working with this guy anymore.

  16. Some people just can’t be pleased. I’ve got a couple guys in my kitchen who blow their lid the minute they have 3+ tickets on the rail. They whine and bitch and throw a fit about everything. Complain about stuff not being done but then don’t do anything when it’s their turn. Show up for shifts acting like they don’t have to do anything but turn out tickets then they bitch about that the whole time anyway. Stocking the line? Never heard of her. Throwing fits and throwing sandwiches because of “all these fat fucks.” It’s absolute insanity. My guy, my dude, my brother in fuck this place; it’s not, nor has it ever been, that serious.

  17. anynamesleft

    My understanding is that cooks / restaurant staff are far too often grossly underpaid, understaffed, and overworked. It stands to reason such folks might not be the most mentally stable they can be.

    I’m getting to retirement age and I’m trying to do the restaurant thing to end my work career. I’m going into it with a passion, but also an understanding: It’s an industry chick full of problems. Problems often beyond one’s control.

    Staff have a reputation, deserved or not, of being mentally off, drug addicts, and worse. It’s up to us all to elevate the professional aspects and try to negate the negatives.

    Stay safe y’all, I’m doing my best to encourage, train, and help in any small way I can. Y’all do the same.

  18. Sanquinity

    Glad work culture isn’t like that here. Annoyance and anger happens. Complaints and talking badly about each other also happens from time to time. But helping and respecting each other are mandatory.

    I know this for a fact because 2 people have been fired for not doing so over the past 3 years I’ve worked here.

  19. BraveMonke

    God forbid, you have to do your job that you chose to work at

  20. ChronicallyPermuted

    You’re 20? Get out now, it only gets worse. What you described is literally the environment at every single restaurant in the world. Misery loves company and everyone in restaurants is super fucking miserable. I used to know a pastry chef that would lose her shit because desserts are the last things ordered every night; I figured she had other stuff going on that was exacerbated by her work situation and I was right in the end.

    To address your venting: It is extremely annoying when the new person doesn’t pay attention to the ticket system. There’s a system, figure it out and stop asking; the other cooks are trying to focus and keep things straight in their heads, too, and you’re not helping with that. Also, I would yell at you for not calling things out as well; that’s the only way anyone else knows you heard it. I’ve seen trainwrecks from people getting lazy about call outs, then not hearing something and no one knows there’s a problem until everything is dying in the window and a fucking medium well steak hasn’t been fired yet or some shit.These are both first day in the kitchen things you should already know…

    It’s extremely likely no one gives a shit that you’re trans, positively or negatively. Kitchens are full of misfits. It’s also extremely likely no one gives a shit about your feelings, the kitchen isn’t a psychologist’s office, and that they are going thru their own shit in their own lives outside of work. It’s a side effect of being young, but you will eventually realize that no one else is anywhere near as concerned about you as you are lol

  21. Capital-Special-9625

    it’s really only when you have a group of 12 people walk in 3 minutes before you close after a fully stacked saturday night.
    of course there’s nothing technically wrong with that, but anyone even remotely familiar with the industry can agree how can that be interpreted as a dick move.
    we’d serve them just as we would at any other time during service, but as we are in fact human we’d be at lesst a TINY bit pissed that we now have to stay back another 45 mins.

  22. zigaliciousone

    If you did a Venn diagram of cooks, there are ones that do it because they think it’s easy and like the money more cooking. Then there are ones who actually have a passion for cooking.

      The angry ones tend to be mostly the ones who do it because it’s a job with a little overlap with the REALLY passionate cooks who think everyone else is an obstacle

  23. drcockasaurus

    It’s Sunday again? I thought we’d skip the weekend and brunch would be cancelled nationwide.

  24. Fit-Chapter8565

    I mean technically,  someone could die. 

  25. Tasty-Performer6669

    Unrealistic expectations on speed and quality for shit hours and shit pay is my guess

  26. CoupDeGrassi

    Many cooks are walking burnouts. They need to take a year off but can’t or won’t. Once you’re burned, everything makes you miserable, and you bring that toxic mentality into every aspect of your job.

    I avoid burnout these days by just keeping an even keel, reminding myself why I love the work every day, and by making it my personal job to keep morale high. I also take vacation time, I use the 5 sick days my govt. allows, and I don’t deal with work once im at home.

    Ive been burned out before, and Im just as much of a miserable prick as any chef when I am.

  27. i only ever got mad about this shit with doordash, cuz I was a takeout server and didn’t even make any money putting the orders together.

  28. SinisterDirge

    Cause they are people. Same as any other industry.

    No different than the forklift driver getting paid 80k to move shit from one place to another, but bitches about having to move that thing right there to that place over there….

    Human nature.

    Besides, mostly I am very polite and I recognize I am here to cook for people. I acknowledge that the guests showing up 2 mins to close means that I am busy and I have a job and I am grateful because it means my food cost goes down and there is less wastage.

    But sometimes, I just want to go home.

  29. kidsaredead

    last night i got 12 pizzas, 4 minutes before apps were closing. thx undecided people that are hungry for buying them but man… it is annoying.

  30. AWiseOlToaster

    You’re seriously going to order food? At my restaurant? During our posted hours of operation? Jfc the entitlement of some people.

  31. ceris7356

    I’ve worked with some people like this. It doesn’t make a lick of sense to me. Dudes be swearing loud enough for the dining room to hear when people come in an hour before close. It’s your job to cook food for people. They get mad when they’re there a minute past closing time too.

  32. Bitchy_Satan

    Idk man how happy are you to cook $1700 worth of food for 10 hours with only one other person for help and no chance of saying even a penny more then your measly $15 an hour

  33. CheckyoPantries

    They are your coworkers. They don’t care about you.

    I’m on the spectrum myself, and always had a hard time wrapping my head around how people distance themselves from people they spend all day with, but it’s honestly just that.

    They are their own person and believe they are the only person they have to pay attention to or care about. That’s all. It’s not their fault, they just don’t know that they could make things better by being reasonable and warm instead.

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