I'm glad that my work phone is an iPhone and you can unsend a text…

Fucking "ants ate my shoes" wasn't any where near what I could deal with at 0430

by The_Arcadian

26 Comments

  1. PrettylightedUMphrek

    Looks like his vacation is going to be cut short with no job !!

  2. ModestMussorgsky

    Goddamn dude just say you have diarrhea!!

  3. Altruistic_Cause_312

    Hey boss, I am currently throwing up and shitting my brains out. I believe food safety dictates I should not be working. Thank you.

  4. spacex-predator

    Well, that’s a new excuse… what a dong.

  5. BeastM0de1155

    Worst “call out” attempt imo. “Boss, very ill. I won’t be able to work tonight”.

  6. _My9RidesShotgun

    Okay but I wanna know what the unsent message said lol.

  7. bails0bub

    I had a dude who had to spend 30 minutes in a walk in grinding meat, call in the next day having poorly colored his foot blue with a sharpie telling me he had Frost bite…this was in tx in August

  8. The_Arcadian

    And yeah, he’s in a strong union. Could’ve just said that he’s sick and taking PTO and I would have worked a 13 and covered his shift. But some people are too dumb to be lazy.

  9. HikingHippi

    I had a cook who called out all the time. One of his excuses was that his friend was bitten by a dog and he had to go visit him in the hospital

  10. i__hate__stairs

    Have him come in with flip flops and inventory toothpicks from out front somewhere.

  11. energyinmotion

    I had a guy call out, while he was at work, for the next day, because he’s out of money and running low on gas. He asked for 10 bucks but no one gave him anything because he still owes a different cook some money.

  12. kiltminotaur

    Back when i was a dishie, we had a fry cook suddenly freak out, shout “i gotta go there’s spiders in my ear” and bilt out the door.

    I honestly don’t remember if we ever saw him again.

  13. “What are these… shoes for ants?”

    “err yes”

  14. Primary-Run-1410

    Oh man. Did run out of Grandma’s?

  15. Primary-Run-1410

    HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE FOR ANTS TO EAT

  16. poutinegalvaude

    I’ve called out from Disneyland, Main Street music blaring in the background.

    I’ve called out and then run into my boss at the bar. I’m still employed there.

  17. Mother_Following_961

    What kinda fuxking ants do yall have over there. I always keep a pair of kitchen shoes at work. Like a civilized kitchen rat

  18. Responsible-Ebb2933

    I live in the tropics and have had ants destroy tings like shoes, so it took me reading the comments to realize what was fucked about this call out

  19. UrpaDurpa

    First, the ants came for our shoes, but I said nothing because I don’t wear shoes…

  20. Beginning-Cat3605

    Oooohhh the bullshit. Never gets old 🙄

    Tempted to just message “dawg, fuck your shoes and fuck yourself. Come to work.”

  21. EmDeeAech70

    Once had a CIA graduate call off because he didn’t have a clean uniform. TBF, this was at a tourist-y resort and 95% of the staff were college kids on summer break working for beer money 🤷‍♂️🙄

  22. ACanWontAttitude

    My worst one was ‘I have to stay home because my freezer defrosted overnight’

    Like what?? Also we are RNs so because her freezer fucked up I had to take care of her patients and do my job as charge.

  23. When the shoe eating ants take over the world I’m blaming you for not sounding the alarm.

  24. shinyidolomantis

    Our old dishwasher didn’t have a car so my boss would pick him up/drop him off. One day AFTER my boss had dropped him off and went home he called and said he forgot his staff meal at work and wanted my boss to drive back to work, pick it up, and drive it to his house. My boss was already a couple beers in and said he’s sorry but he can’t do that. The next morning the dishwasher called in because he was “malnourished” (he was over 300lbs too, so definitely could stand to miss a meal every now and then).

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