I make many of my relatives' birthday cakes and have done so for a couple of years, but the polite asking for a cake turned into a sort of "self explanatory" thing for them. One year when I didn't make a cake for my relative, they got really upset and claimed I ruined their birthday because they didn't have a cake. Mind you they didn't even ask me for one, they just expected it because I baked one for them previously.
This ordeal morphed into a sort of thing where now I bake them a cake yearly, and they just take it, say "good" and chuck it in the fridge until serving haha. It's not even the expecting from their part that bothers me, but they don't thank me for the cake or even acknowledge the fact I put effort into it. In some occurrences my other relatives thank me (even though it's not even their birthday) but in others they even start critiquing it. Too sweet, not sweet enough, too dense, too chocolatey. This year my grandma said this lemon blueberry cake had too much lemon in it and she didn't like it. The birthday fellow didn't comment on it š
I'm also just a teenager, not a professional baker or something. I don't charge for the cakes since it's part of my birthday gift basically. Thank you for reading to the end. I hope my post didn't come off as petty, tldr I just wanted to rant about how my relatives aren't grateful for the cake I make for them yearly. Of course I could just inform them and say that I don't want to bake for them, but it's almost turning into a sort of challenge of creating a cake that will one year not gain any critique and will be worth a thank-you from them š
Recipe:
https://sallysbakingaddiction.com/lemon-blueberry-layer-cake/
I made tweaks: added a tub of ricotta to the frosting and halved the powdered sugar; baked in 23cm pan for 45 mins
by 3ndler
32 Comments
This
Is
Stunning
!
Allow me to suggest that you should stop making cakes for your family. Sounds like itās gotten out of hand, and some members are not only ungrateful but critical. This stress on you is not necessary, I would remove myself from this dynamic.
Edit to add: your cake is gorgeous. Anyone who tells you anything other than āthank youā and āthis is greatā can kick rocks!
Thank you for sharing this image. Itās beautiful, and I bet it tasted like a dream.
Iām glad youāre turning their bad manners on its head and making it a challenge for yourself, but thereās also no pleasing rude people. Slap some Little Debbie snack cakes on the table next year and eat your homemade cake in peace with people who appreciate it.
That is beautiful.
Beautiful cake! You don’t have to bake anything and you didn’t ruin their party just because they didn’t plan their party accordingly.
Simply Lovely
Thank you for sharing your skills. This cake made me smile.
Dog looks thankful.
That is beautiful and sounds amazing! š¤© your family sucks btw š
this cake is adorable! thanks for sharing it šĀ
i am also in the “don’t make cakes for ungrateful family members” camp, but i know when you’re a teen sometimes it’s just about survival. i’m sure once you survive these people you will thrive irl whether you choose to bake or something else
Thank you for making that cake.
I would be so happy if someone made me a cake like this. Thanks for sharing! It looks so good.
I feel you. One year for Thanksgiving I made a vegan pumpkin pie (! Vegan custard pie!) with homemade crust for a party hosted by a guy I was into. It came out super tasty, way tastier than the store bought vegan pumpkin pie someone else had brought. He barely even smiled. I stopped dating him shortly after and now I only bake for the people in my life who appreciate it!
Echoing all the thanks for sharing. That looks seriously delicious. Like worth putting in extra steps to enjoy a huge piece delicious.
The more you do for (some) people, the more they expect.
I would literally cry if I received this, itās beautiful!
The cake is boss and your relatives are jerks.
Cake looks great! Sorry your family doesnāt special it.
But the real question is- did anyone give a piece to the doggo? Iām sure heād like it š
You donāt sound petty at all, and I know how you feel. This post made me so sad! When you really put thought, effort, and time (and money) into making something lovely for someone, it does feel personal when things like this happen. You clearly have a lot of skill, thatās a beautiful cake, but I think some people think because you do something well, or are talented, that itās quick and easy and expected of you to always be able to do it. I would kindly suggest you steer away from continuing making these cakes for them, or you may find you lose your passion and love for doing it. I went through something similar as a teen but with paintings. I would have been really touched to receive a gift like yours.
Word of advice:
You made this beautiful and surely delicious cake because youāre a kind and generous person. Donāt let anyone take that away from you just because they arenāt.
I hate when people do this. I’m not a teenager and live far away from family but I love to bake and would consider myself decent at it. I’m expected to make holiday desserts every year and do because I really enjoy it. However, no one ever says anything or they complain. Last year, my mom told me that everyone wanted me to make a cheesecake. I spent all day the day before making a special/fancy recipe i found. Fast forward to day of, everyone ate it and no one said any except my aunt who said “cheesecake is probably my least favorite dessert”. It’s so disheartening. Your cake looks absolutely amazing though.
Seems like there is a pattern hereā¦
Love the cake btw ! Nice technique as well
Don’t make extra work for yourself. Set boundaries and if they ask for a cake, then bake one (If you have the time). Otherwise, let them get their own. I would love a piece of that cake. You are baking from the heart. Don’t let people take you for granted. That is a beautiful gift of love.
This is beautiful!!!
Can I be your family? That cake looks amazing! I’d bring the main dish and sides! And so dishes for such a cake.Ā Ā
I would legit cry if someone took the time to make me this beauty! Donāt let them dim your light. Hopefully you can bake for a more deserving crowd moving forward.
I read this and assumed you were some middle-aged baker, but you’re a teenager?? Wow! That is a beautiful cake, and it’s very thoughtful that you even bake for others.
However, it looks like it’s time to stop. I’m sorry your relatives suck. You can say you’re busy with school or activities and didn’t have time. When someone’s birthday is coming up, you tell them you won’t be baking their cake so they have time to find an alternative.
ETA It looks like the puppers would greatly appreciate your cake.
Before you hand it over, act like a mom with a five year old, hold it away from them, and say, āand what do you say?ā
Wait til they say either please or thank you or I worship at your feet. Whatever you want and donāt hand over the cake.
Dude this looks phenomenal. One year when I was first honing my piping skills I made a beautiful 3 layer white cake with SMBC for mothers day. My mom said it was dense and my grandma said I would have been better off using boxed mix. Needless to say, I don’t bake for them anymore and my mental health improved (and baking, likely) improved because of it.
First, your cake is utterly charming and I bet it tasted delicious. You definitely have a talentedĀ
Secondly, only make cakes for yourself and people who respect your gift, time, and skill. Never sell yourself short.
Beautiful!
You made a very beautiful cake, and you seem like a very kind and thoughtful person. Please don’t let others take advantage of you. I say that as someone who allowed people to take advantage of me for a very long time. We always hope they’ll see our worth if we just do **more**. But if they can’t appreciate you after all the effort you’ve made, they’re not worth it. That’s a *them* problem, not a *you* problem.