Dan Soder + Katie Nolan cook Sausage & Peppers – Look at Dish #32

Dan Soder and Katie Nolan join Tommy Pope and Chris O’Connor for this week’s Look at Dish to cook Sausage and Peppers!

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Look at Dish is a comedy cooking show starring your hosts Tommy Pope and Chris O’Connor. You may have seen Tommy and Chris on Comedy Central or Netflix’s show Tires. Look at Dish has been in production for over three years and is finally becoming available for the public for free! The duo also have a podcast called Stuff Island

Look at Dish is a cooking show where your favorite stand up comedians join hosts Tommy Pope and Chris O’Connor to make elaborate meals, shoot the sh*t and laugh. Make sure you check out Patreon if you want more content!

Animation by Scott Convery
Featuring “Holiday” by Stalefish

https://www.submithub.com/link/stalefish-holiday

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#comedy #cooking #comedycooking

They woke up and drank at like 8:00 a.m. Cheers, guys. We’re hung over. We’re drinking again. What are you guys cooking drunk? What are you, my mom and dad? Can I get one of those bloody maryries? Chris is too up. Too [ __ ] up. You’re too drunk. Get him a redheaded [ __ ] Get with it, Chris. Uh, we’re looking for sausage. We’re gay as [ __ ] We’re cooking sausage and peppers. Mom, Dad, please. What’s the thing that we’re making called? We’ve said we’re making sausages 15 times. You guys really are like a drunk married couple. I’m drunk. Get out of there. Get out of there. All right, guys. That’s our show. Thank you so much. [Music] We’re hung over. We’re drinking again. It’s 9:00 a.m. Spring Lounge. What a summary of my last 30 years. All right. Cheers. What are you doing? Cheers. Should I try to split the G? Oh, there’s no G. Act like it is. Was it legitimately the worst day of my life? It was uh 911. It wasn’t my 911. It wasn’t my But this was my 911 occurred on It could have been any Tuesday. It was It was the 911 that we opened up outdoor seating. I think it was 2021 or whatever. And we were swarmed with firemen and I had to I had to go up to firemen and tell, “Hey, could you guys please sit down? We’re not allowed for you to stand out.” They’re all smoking cigars and getting crazy and I’d be like, “Guys, I need you to sit and socially distance.” And they looked at me. Yeah. Like I was just And I remember just lost my whole family. Get the out of my face. I would have put on You have any idea what I’ve been through? Still got sod all over his face. This guy come and wiping sod off his face. You want me to sit down? Sit on that. Drywall in his eyes. I was I felt like such a [ __ ] earlier. Dude, that’s hilarious. What do you call this uh this morning session? I that this is the early morning drinker society. Drinker society. Let me give you guys your official. You guys are OG’s. I am. I got mine 15 years ago. Maybe start. [Laughter] I haven’t left since 8 a.m. to 2:00 p.m. One punch per session. So, we’re a part of this. I don’t want to disrespect. You’re not a part yet. You got to finish your card. And then when you finish your card, we do a little song and dance. You sign a ledger. I give you a t-shirt. I bate you a little bit. It’s a good time. Wolfiey’s card starts today. Here you go. My man, Wolfie, you’re you’re you’re a newbie here. Newbie. Newbie. First time. First time. Yep. First punch. No [ __ ] Yeah. Now, now I got to bring you back 15 times. 14 more. Oh, I had to get up at 4:00 this morning to get here. Yeah. Where you from? Pocono Mountains. You’re from Poconos? Yeah. I used to vacation at R Paulac. Okay. Wake Harmony. Good bars there, too. They don’t open at any They don’t close either. That’s how he got his nickname up there. Tequila Ken. Yeah. Tequila. That’s your nickname. 60 years without a nickname. And then boom, there you go. And that was it. It just it stuck. 60 years. Tequila Ken. That’s my future. I’m looking at my That’s a dog barking itself in the mirror. That’s my future right there. Tequila Tom. Tequila Tom. The only punches in this card I’m going to have. That’s a big day for everybody. Tequila Tacoma. Tequila Tacoma. Tommy. So I got Dave. Thanks for having great to see you guys. What’s the best morning drink? We do tequila. Just straight tequila. Thanks, guys. How’s it like Okconor? Right, you’re Irish. Let’s go. Cheers. Cheers, guys. Good to see you. Success with your podcast. Thank you, brother. Cheers, guys. [Music] What do you some rolls here? Yeah, it’s a bridge. Apparently the best. Looks pretty good. Uh, can I get uh two of those seated long rolls? This the paper. Yeah. You hear that? The sound. The sound. You hear it? The sound. That’s it. That’s it. It’s good paper. You got your card. They’re rolling it up like a bouquet. Beautiful. Beautiful. We’re going this way. Can I just take a bite out of one of the Oh, it’s all wrapped up. Oh, that’s the problem. That’s what’s holding you back from taking a bite. I want to take a bite out of No, this is We need it for I know. That’s why I Maybe we should get another one so we can bite it. Do you want to go get a sec a third roll so you can have a bite? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Sorry, brother. Watch yourself. There’s somebody behind you. Look at that sandwich. I toss and turn in the bed and when I wake up, my eyebrows are all out of whack. my mustache. It has like eyelashes. Uh, can I just get another one of those seated rolls? And these get smashed. My babies get smashed. What a rat. Oh, low key. I do love them. Shut up. Shut up. I’m talking about my eyelashes, [ __ ] I don’t have any cash. Um, got to get uh I’ll get another one of those rolls then. So, you know, I mean, already drunk and angry. It’s uh 10:21 a.m. This is the bread boy. I had to get $10 worth of bread. Yeah, I like it. Now, the end is choice. It’s so packaged. It’s wonderful. There’s no butter. There’s no olive oil. There’s no food. Taste it for what it’s worth. Should have gotten a simolin. You want to go back for another couple rolls? I don’t even know if they have semolina in there. I didn’t see any. Why do you want semolina? It’s the best bread. Give uh people, Dave, a reference of of what this institution is. It’s been a bar in some form of fashion since 1927. Uh it was a speak easy that used to be a pizza place. They used to do before that they did buckets of beer out the back window. At some point it was called Wilson’s 10:30. There was a 10:30 crap game every night. Then it was called Chappies. I forget the exact lineage of things. At some point they found sharks in the basement. They put them up in the neighborhood. It started to be called the Shark Bar. It’s been in famous movies like the Pope of Greenwich Village. Bunch of other movies that I recall. Yeah. It’s when sitting in the park eating the eating the sandwich. He goes, “You got a license to [ __ ] in the street.” And he goes, “What?” He goes, “Screw you eat like a horse.” That was in that park. That’s what I filmed at. Yeah, that’s huge. I know. I know. They said 10:30 crab game. I was like, “Yeah, I got one of those.” What time is it? Apparently, they used to do a crab game in the basement. It’s 9:45. I can make that happen. The current owner has owned it since 1997. It’s spring the spring lounge and it’s just the best bar in Manhattan. What do you mean they found sharks in the basement? They found these sharks. This Oh, like and the one in the back. They found them in the basement and they were like, “What the are we going to do with these?” Like, they literally unearthed them. Yeah. Yeah. And like we throw these out. No. Put them up on the wall. And then the neighborhood, all the guineies in Little Italy started calling them the shark bar. Yeah. Can I get one of those bloody Marys? Yeah. You got to put you do uh Titos. Yeah. Let her Whatever. However you do it, you got to put them. Shane told me the story. You guys got to hear this story. You know, Bob, you I’m listening. So, you got to listen to the story. Shane told me the story that apparently when back when he was playing uh baseball, he uh he was on a team with this guy I think Clyde Ddale and he goes uh he tells a story. There’s also there’s some names that you know the kid’s going to be a professional baseball player that’s a Clyde. Look at this. Look at this. That’s a hell of a bloody Mary. Uh how about when I have them I have Bloody Maras. Oh, I like tequila, too. Yeah, dude. I’m with tequila instead of vodka. We know how you got that. I’m sorry. But Uker was playing with this guy Dale and he goes, Dale, this guy, he had a [ __ ] in every town. And I wanted to get Dale bad. So, we’re in Cleveland. Dedale doesn’t know that I’m friends with the chief of police. So, we get him a hooker. I have the hooker fake her death and the chief of police burst into the hotel room. They rip Drydale out. I’m walking down the hallway. Drydale’s he’s handcuffed crying naked as the day he was born. And I go, “Hey, Dale, bags on you.” So 20 minutes later, I’m at the hotel bar. Drydale comes down. Fucker’s still pissed. I thought you going to say he’s still naked. Dude, Dale had like a family and a wife and kids, dude. The recovery. Oh, it’s amazing. So then then apparently they were in Vegas and Dale is like friends with the mob in Vegas. So they’re they’re they’re in Vegas. Dale has the mob kidnap Buer and someone else. Drive them out to the desert. They’re digging their own graves. After they’ve dug the graves, they’re like crying and begging for their lives. And the mob guys just go, “Hey, Buer, bags on you.” Damn, those two dudes in the corner. Tequila. That’s a life. I don’t know if it is. Oh, I disagree, man. Couple happy buddies on a shitty lake. They living in the mountain. Yeah. Coming to Coming to the big city, having a having a few drinks. Lake Harmony in the morning. It’s like green during the day on a weekday. You don’t think that’s bliss? Oh, that’s nice. That’s what we’re doing it. Nobody [ __ ] yapping at you about schedules. about 15 years. It’s great. It’s a dream. I like it. You know what? You’re right. Yeah. I feel bad. I think I left the punch guard at that. Picked it up for you. Oh, good. Oh, good. That’s all you got for me? It’s an honor. It is. To be knighted into the [ __ ] Alcoholics Drinker Society. Yeah, those guys earned it. Uh-oh. Um, we’re going the wrong way. No, we’re not. It’s up here on the right in Chinatown. You want to get a foot rub back rub? Couple sausages get jerked off. Hey, uh, Dave. Yo, what’s the other one? What’s the the redheaded [ __ ] Get him a redheaded [ __ ] What is it? Jagger Meister. Peach snaps. I blind pour these. I don’t [ __ ] care. Yeah, of course. And uh we’re doing this. If I can wink, I would wink right at the camera. If you had a punchy wink like if you had a punch card, how many holes would be in it, do you think? If I had a punch card. Jesus, that’s a great question. I’ve been here seven years, dude. That thing would be [ __ ] It’s a lot of [ __ ] [ __ ] enough to snort it. Let’s see if I blind poured this correctly. Man, there you go. The sausage and peppers I’m about to cook is going to be I thought you’re going to [ __ ] rip it. It’s probably just going to be me and you going, “That’s delicious.” And they’re going to be throwing up in a cave. Yeah, this is great. Two two sober people. Oh, dude. Look at that. Hey, we’ve been drinking all morning. Look at that. Did you do that online? Poor babe. That’s crazy. You want to redheaded? It’s [ __ ] redheaded [ __ ] for the boys. All right, dude. Thank you so much. Hey, you got it. Tell me. Good to see you. This is great. Josh, you can’t come in. No pets. [Music] Wow. Wow. Wow. What are we getting here? Sausage. Yeah. Hi. Good morning. Uh, we’re looking for sausage for sausage and peppers. Do you have that? Fresh pork sausage. Yeah, I don’t have today. Do you guys have anything that resembles sausage? I appreciate you. Well, oh, you know what? I’m thinking still thinking Texas. Yeah. Yeah, they’ve come sharp here. See if they sharp. I should. Yeah. No. No. Okay. Thanks. Do you have a sharp cheddar cheese? So, I have some Italian cheeses that are in a family like cheddar, but not the olive, not cheddar. You want to try? Yeah. You want to try it? Yeah. Thank you. Thank you so much. It was in the refrigerator, so it’s cold. Room temperature. So the flavor comes out a little bit. Wonderful. You like that? Yeah. Can I have a quarter pound of that? Yeah. Thank you. Oh yeah. Oh wow. Yeah. And definitely let it come to room temperature. That’s amazing. [Music] Northern Italy now. Let’s go. I’m glad I thought of this. I was like, why why don’t we go back in and get some cheese? I’m so smart. [Music] [Applause] Next time you see us, [Music] we’re going to be with Dan Soder and Katie Nolan, and they’re both going to be annoyed with how drunk we are. This was a huge scheduling mistake. It’s a giant mistake. You should have sobered up. We should have exercised and been ready for sod and Katie. We’re going to make a sausage. I don’t even know if Katie and Dan wanted a sausage. I don’t know whose idea that was. Hopefully Tommy can put something special on it. Cuz I got Yeah, I love them. Yeah, I think it’s going to be bad. I think I’m going to end the day pretty ashamed of what we did. If I had to get so [Music] guys, we have a cut off here. We have to get out of here by four. Okay. Well, four people was a bad idea. That was a great idea. That’s a beautiful idea. This is That’s why we chose sausages. How long have I been sitting here? No, actually, you know what I do? You know, you know where this came from? Where did it come from? Katie, I did this. So, yeah, I texted I texted as I misheard as I do with No, I can pull it up about everything. Huh? Are you [ __ ] receipt? You guys really do have you guys have it. Have you ever seen the show? I’m interested in this whole show. I could let me tell you right now as former front going to explode. This is back of house energy that we need because I got to focus. I got to do [ __ ] Yeah, I know. I could go like Chris look at this basil. It’s nice, right? He goes that’s right. Is that basil? That’s not I don’t do that. Yes, you do. It’s the same [ __ ] thing. I just religion is it from you having J are you having Japanese and you don’t know? You’re having Japanese tea. What? Yeah, it’s a photo box. Looks like he’s just having I know the cup. It looks way more It makes you look way more zen than you are. Whose house is this? This is what Whose house is this? I live here. He bought it. And I’ve rented this to have you guys here to be peaceful. Okay. And it’s not working out. Let’s talk about I don’t think it’s Spring Lounge. Let’s talk a reason why it might not be as smooth as we want it to be. And let’s talk Spring Lounge in the morning. We got [ __ ] up at 8:00. They woke up and drank at like 8:00 a.m. Okay, by the way, they child of alcoholics. I walk in here and immediately taste I immediately walk in and go, “What are you guys cooking drunk? What are you, my mom and dad?” Like, I don’t know when I walk into a kitchen and people are hammered. I was surprised you wouldn’t want to just do dino nuggets. You guys just want to publish this. You guys need an air fryer now. What about dino nuggets? Funniest thing, my girl puts together this shot schedule. It was the most professional thing we’ve ever done. It is since we started this whole thing. Chris shows up yesterday. Like 45 minutes late. Diva. Today we got When did we leave? When did we leave the bar last night? Like 2 1:00 2:00. He texts me at 7:30. He goes, “We still doing the spring lounge at 8?” I was like, “I’ve never heard from him.” Well, I woke up at 7 and I texted him like, “Oh my god, dude. I don’t feel so good. We got a long day. Let’s make it longer.” I didn’t hear anything back. And then at 7:45, I was like, “We still doing that?” Yeah. Yeah. You guys are going to go to bed at like 400 p.m. Oh my god. That’s the thing where you wake up at 9:00 p.m. You got to fight. I think What kind of dark is it? Is it tomorrow night or tonight? Can I go a full day or is it just a few hours? Is it Monday? No. God, please be Monday. That jacks your heart rate and then you cough right back up. Right back up. The sausage if you could cough onto the sausage. Right back up to stay awake all day. Yeah, we were picking up seasoning walking through Canal Street. Wait, no, I’m just kidding. It’s a Chinese joke. Spring Lounge. Talking about co Yeah. You want to talk about Spring Lounge? Early morning Drinking Society. It’s going to open up this whole episode. Spring Spring Lounge is a a legendary bar in Soho, right? I was asking for the viewer. I knew obviously. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Her that’s one of her old humps. Say what it is. Yeah. Say more about it. This is a true card though. You got invited to it. They have a question. That’s a real card. Dan, I’m holding a real card. And by the way, official members, I know you guys can’t read the fine print. Those are very difficult to First of all, that’s how you know I’m a drunk. I’m like, first of all, this is 10 punches. You’re in the society. You’re acting like this isn’t a [ __ ] thing. get to think. Tommy’s getting itchy like I’m holding the Declaration of Independence out of the casing. You get pulled over by the cops. Just slide. Oh, there’s nothing more between your license and the registration, officer. I think you’ll enjoy what I have here. Little bars and rolling inward. Unroll it like a scroll. There it is. I am a member. If you give that to a cop, I think they have her a prefilled DIY out where they go. There you go. That all Yeah, that’s all that’s the paperwork. Your guys’s little springtime lounge. By the way, can I also tell you Springtime Lounge does Spring Lounge? I don’t care. It still sounds still sounds like a gay background. Springtime. This is That’s what they call gay sex in the 40s. Hey, it looks like it’s ready for springtime. Guys up, he’s straight all of a sudden. [ __ ] Yeah, dude. I don’t drink those. I don’t drink that kissing juice no more. You can’t guess sipping on kissing juice. When’s the last time you sucked a dick? When’s the last time? Yeah. Yeah. Guess it was a real pin cushion in the spring lounge. 15 stamps. Get a t-shirt in my ass. Just wake up at one of their houses. All right. This is Look at this. This is uh this is Katie Nolan. Day six. We’re making sauces. Come on. We got to get the sauces. We got to get cooking. Dan Soder. Katie actually legitimately I asked Dan and Katie as I do with most of our guests. What do you love to eat? And you said, “I don’t give a shit.” Typical of any comedian. I don’t care. Katie gave me a few things. Yeah. You gave me a great long list. She was in the other room and it was one of those things where you’re reading the text and you come through and you go, “What do you What do you say? What do you You’re burying me.” I’m on the text. I’m like, “Yeah, whatever.” K’s like, “I’m not going to lie. I love a good chicken porn. We love sausage.” She wasn’t wrong about any of it, but I’m like, “Hey, yeah, you’re over shoulder.” We both didn’t do the homework. We both didn’t do that. Now I’m just on every text your friends try to send you cuz I’m the only one that can get information. Dan up. You know, he is alive. Proof of life. I’ll go grab my whole life. We got proof of Let Tommy do his speech. Yeah. Anyway, this is perfect because we we planned on filming the San Janeiro Festival. We tried the sausage and peppers there. I made it once. What happened? Why did you guys try them? What? Why is he laughing? He Cuz this is what he does. He preamble. What do you mean? What do you want me to do? Just we’re making sausages. Let’s start making them. Damn. Go ahead. Damn. Damn. I’m not going to lie. You guys have a partnership. Like these sausages are going to be incredible. Dude, I that kind of These are the guys you buy the sausages from. The two that are fighting. You go. I’m going to tell you right now. You’re going to have the best sausage of your life. They are cutting. They’re hard to be around. They do not like each other. They’re spicy. So get them while you can. There’s no shot we’re getting this done. What do you mean? What time’s your breakdown? They look at me. You gone. Chris is too [ __ ] up. You’re too [ __ ] up. You’re too drunk. You’re He’s looking at turning the oven on. Here’s the [ __ ] oven. Yeah. Come back. Now we’re serving a sausage business. He’s all jacked on coke. Dude, this is so insane. The fact that the fact that he’s laughing at me, I’m just introducing what we’re about to cook. And he goes, “We said we’re making sausages 15 time.” Tommy, I knew you when you’re kid. We’re cooking sausage and peppers for Katie cuz she sent me a [ __ ] text. Bacon. I think I did. I think I did. I don’t want to be in the middle of this. Mom, dad, nobody needs. I love it. You are a [ __ ] sucker. What you do is you put a little oil in the pan. You know what? Everybody’s having a good [ __ ] time. And when it comes down to it, I have to do everything. And then he’s going to be Can you imagine going to a podcast and be like, “How can I help Tommy? Tommy, how can Let them flip off. Let’s I got you. Let’s how. Today we’re doing sausages. They are It appears like just off my eye a spicy type and a not that spicy, which is good for me cuz I don’t like spice. It’s embarrassing. Um this is called This is bread. I got it. You did you get your stuff now? He’s showing my text messages. No, I’m going to read it. I’m going to give away your social security if you watch to the end. Oh, no. I’ll miss some of the cooking, but I get to do all the eating. Sounds horrible. Yeah, I did. I’m sure you’ve done chicken parm already. We have cuz of you. But if you wanted to recreate that chicken parm pizza thing, quality Italian [ __ ] that up. Pretty much any pasta. Sausage and peppers. Okay. Me. And here we are in the sausage. Peppers. And here we are. And then you’ll zoom in and then it’ll cut to the next. And I need to regroup. Let’s go. What? There’s no good. Oh, good. You’re a little upset. You’re a little drunk. Sorry. Get out of there. Get out of there. You’re showing 10 seconds. What’s up? I thought we were regrouping. And now everybody made up. No one regroups like regroup. Show them how to cut an onion. Yeah. Oh, I think I know how to cut an onion. I just learned. There’s only three things to do. I swear to God if you would agree to just get in your underwear and act like the 5-year-old you are. It would be so funny. I’m as close to underwear as I can. I will I have underwear on my head. I know. Chris might be drunk. I love how you’re trying to convince us right. Fix the mics. That’s big. Fix my mic. All we’re going to break down and then uh we’re going to put the sausage on and then we’ll we’ll cook a break down. I already did. Yeah. See, this is how you do it. The sniper. All we do is bark. She waits in the [ __ ] shadows. Tommy, Tommy, I military crawl through my apartment. Not the idea. I got to check if she’s around the corner. You’re in good [ __ ] You got just sliding piece. She goes, “What’s that t-shirt?” I go, “Son of a [ __ ] I bought this 10 years ago. It fits nice.” God fits nice. Well, I don’t like the thick neck. Take it. Take it. Put it on the knife. Guys, we got to we got to get moving. I know. So, let’s go, Dad. All right. Step one. Step one. She goes, “Oh, there’s a nice there’s a nice defilade on that.” She goes, “Are you wearing a wrestling shirt?” You were right by me. You come out sometimes and you are wearing a wrestling t-shirt and jeans and you go, “Does this look okay?” What am I supposed to say? That’s why I’m the indie bride that I say if you want to be wearing a wrestling t-shirt and jeans then yes it looks like a wrestling t-shirt and jeans but there’s no reason to ask for the it’s like he wants me to go I don’t know man you’re 42 maybe we put on a different shirt but I don’t say but I put the gun I put the gun on my head I go [ __ ] do it if you got the kill if you got the marbles tell me my shirt looks gay as [ __ ] she goes it looks a little gay I go why are you saying that to me you do this on purpose. No, she’s the best. She’s the greatest thing in the world. And once we learn how to do these sausage or peppers, no stopping us. What’s your favorite wrestling shirt? Uh, out of the moment. It’s the new Japan shirt cuz he just bought it in a long New Japan. Yeah, it’s Japanese wrestling. Get with it, Chris. They were stiff. That’s the one question I don’t know. Feels like a state that would be here if the Japanese colonized America. It’ be what? New Japan. Like New Amster. Is he doing a new hamster? Like I feel like Christian clicking a flashlight. I’m sorry. What did you say? Chris New Jersey, New England. New Japan. Follow the thumb. Follow the thumb. Sir, I understand that you’re a local council member, but I’m going to have to ask you. [Laughter] I just feel like you’re a Japanese. No, I saw the spring lounge car and I would just like you to understand. And you’re one punch away from her shirt. So, this isn’t my kitchen. These aren’t my utensils, so I’m a little [ __ ] Is this weird cooking for you in the kitchen that you don’t know? Yeah, 100%. I was right. You do just to put a little oil in the pan, dude. I figured out what your energy is. Chris Chris’s restaurant manager that’s been at the bar tasting tequila and comes back into the kitchen. He’s the AGM. Yeah, he’s the AGM kitchen nightmares. And he comes in and he goes, he goes, “That reposado is pretty good. What are you doing? Putting oil in the pan?” But he’s also the guy that defends the shittiest dish. Going, I tasted it. It’s good. Fine. It’s good. It’s fine. It’s fine. I think you put on the front of the menu. I think I think you cut it after restaurant week was a mistake. I am 100% that guy. Yeah. What do we do? We’re just cooking it. You don’t want us to be doing something else. No, you’re here, right? We just get to witness it. Oh, drink it in. I thought we had to cook. You can cook. You want to cook? Let’s cut some veggies and uh we will cut some veggies. Sorry, I have to make that noise when she grabs my butt cheeks. It was a secret squeeze. I’m secretly squeezing your ass. Then you just told everybody she got a digit in there. That’s crazy. Oh my god. I don’t I don’t I don’t Oh, we cutting cutting rings. Yeah, we’re going to do that right after I drop these cuz I want to sear these off. Oh, look. You made like a little wall. No. Uh rings. The spicy sausage goes don’t get to the sweet stuff. I don’t know. Goes Hey, hey, hey. If you want to get to these sweetie pies, you got to go through me. I’m spicy. It’s a real soft chewy sandwich. I’m not fat. You’re putting me on the show. Should I put my hair up for health code violations? No, I don’t think that exists here. Great. He hates me with my hair. A real No. E don’t. And I’ll Your neck is too weak. Don’t show them. I’m not worried about using too much oil. Weird reason. You have a You have You have a veiny neck. You have a very weird weak neck. I’m going to use the same pan and use all the What’s the thing that we’re making called? Is it a sausage sandwich? Do you guys think the San Janeiro festival will smell the sausages and attack us? Like you’re like the birds in birds. Where did you get these? Did you buy these? Will be flying into the window like near here. I’m going to butcher. Very close. Hey, you guys cook a sausage. You’re better than Oh, [ __ ] They’re attacking. Yeah, it’s a World War Zoom. Excuse me. You just see a [ __ ] a crucifix sliding down. I’m leaving with this. You should have seen this. San Janeiro. San Janeiro looks like Michael Jackson. What do you mean? All the uh posters they made of him. He’s got like he’s like this. That’d be sick. No, that almost Yeah. No, he’s like he’s Yeah. Wait, San Janeiro is a What was his first name? Huh? What was his first name? Why’d you look at me like everybody knows? Everybody knows. No. No. Do you know about Sanjiro? Yeah. It’s uh Father, you know the old song. It’s the way to Yeah. No, I don’t know. I think Italians made it up so they could get day drunk. I don’t know. I want to get [ __ ] god forbid you don’t a punch. It’s really all it is is Italian October Fest. It’s [ __ ] Super Bowl. The guy was the guy it’s named after. Sam. His name is Sam. First thing then and what did he do? I don’t know these [ __ ] He did at least three incredible things. You got to be to be a saint. Three great things. He might have also pardoned a meatball. You have to do two miracles. Thanksgiving. He comes out, you know, the president picks a turkey. There was just an Italian guy picks a meatball to be part and he goes, “This meatball is gonna look forever.” You’re not gonna give me just air dry and put it on a necklace. That’s right. Put it in the air fryer. This is the blonde meatball. Damn. Okay, so nobody knows who Sanjinaro is. I was made fun of for not knowing who it was. I know about the festival. You know who the person was? Yeah, I don’t think you give a [ __ ] about Sano. Hey, look at Christmas. A lot of people know about Christmas, but no one truly knows about Christ. Yeah. You want to get into the juice? Look, lock in. Look. Oh, yeah. Think what’s their san Janeiro? We could What if we just instead I was going to say tax day. Same. Chris, here comes building. My goodness. You’ve never cooked with an alcoholic. If you’ve not been near a knife during the morning, the bishop of Bento. Does this microphone just always catch people burping on this show? Cuz I feel like I’m just burping a lot. Look at that. Katie, they’re getting tossed over here. Oh [ __ ] Damn, that’s sexual. Just a bunch of tossing around. Cuz I love you. Should I stop doing it? No. I’ll treat you like a professional. I just don’t want people to Hello. the camera. Get over here. Right here for the camera. Can we get through that a couple times? The feast of San Janeiro. So, you just tossed around the sausages. We’ve done this before. Food now. We’ve done this before. What? You want to reset? We’ve made sausages. We’ve made sausages before. You have? Yeah, cuz I mean, not like literally making them, but you didn’t either. I didn’t either. Yeah. These are done. No. No. That’s kind of gross. Uh I’ I’ve I’ve seen I’ve seen You’ve watched them do it? Yeah. And I went to a pig farm. Is it as gross as they say? I’m too much of an animal lover to like get in that deep. But not enough to stop. But not enough to stop. Right. Cuz I’m not gay. Sure. Gage. Nobody knows his first. His name is January’s. That makes sense. His name is January. That’s real. Januaryious. January. January was born Ben in Benonito. Oh, why are we doing it in September? Yeah, cuz it’s not for his birthday. It’s for It’s for the thing he did, which is he got he killed for believing too much or something. Get the [ __ ] out of here. All right. What are we doing with the onions? Yeah, we’re going to cut the peppers and onions. Great. Fantastic. You want to cut? Yeah. I could if you need, but I don’t think I need. Tell them how to do it. I don’t see why I need them. I got you. Yes, chef. Why do I get a different knife? Cuz we’re both going for Oh, at the same time. Knife bite. How thick. Can you show me how thick? Wait. Wait. Like I think making bits instead of rings. But we’re not we’re doing rings, right? Yeah. We’re not doing rings cuz that’s when you do. I’ve done that before. I think bits are better. That’s mine are too thin. It’s okay. It’s all going to as usual. Oh, too thin. Too thin and bucksing me. You look a fat ass. Those are two different What’s that? Damn. Thanks, baby. Are these good? Are you okay with what I’m doing? Perfect. That’s perfect. Now, this is where things get dicey for me, cuz I can’t hold on to it without like slicing, not dicey. That’s it. Should never get dying. Get this thing out of my way. Get out of here, dude. Give the lady some room. He was encroaching. Are we going to use that other onion or can I make it? I touched my eye. Smart. Don’t do that. Don’t use this last one without cutting your hand off. Sure. Yeah. See, also Yeah. Protect my hand off. Protect your your fingers here with that thumb. Yeah, exactly. Okay, but then who’s holding the onion? There you go. God, there you go. Your finger. That’s a great question. Thank you. Sick onion. Thanks. Sick onion cut. So, there’s a couple ways to do this one. The pepper itself. I’ve seen cutting these sucks. I’ve Yeah. So, I’ve seen two ways. I’ve seen this where you you drop down just beneath I don’t like this piece and then you can rip it out. Okay. I do the I usually cut a slice and then you slice. I crack it open. I cut the middle and then I split it into flat things. And then you could do this taught where you go around. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. And then you save the top. You want to see that? You like that? Is that how you do it? You want my knife, Chris? Chris is pretty fired up. I want to see his method. All right. He was begging to jump in. There you go, Chris. What do you got? How do you do it? That’s dangerous. Nope. Wow. Chris, not a fan. Jesus. I have to say I’m not a fan. No. Yes. Everyone rel. This is every instructional video on what to do with a wound where at first there’s car. Oh, look what you’re doing there. That’s cute. Yeah. The little butts. Look at all the butts. Then you c. But this is easier to slice because you want Okay. Can should I show you my way? My way of the highway. Sorry. I get paid by link biscuits. And you want to show everybody your way, Dan? Uh, how you slice peppers? Sure. Give me my phone and let me open up seamless. Yep. Oh, I like this. Oh, look at this. Nobody likes that. Put some Jameson in there. That’s good. That’s good. Oh, I like that. Look at this. Wow. I like this. I kind of do it uh different every time. Wa. And then you I cut this in half and I flatten it and then I pull this out. Whoa. Like that. All right, guys. That’s our show. Thank you so much. That was crazy. So, I thought you guys were I was so you guys were seen like crazy. It’s the same thing. I Yeah, that’s totally It’s It is. I’m sorry I did that to you. It’s a little less safe, but what are we doing? Long ways. Just like long just to look like these, right? Yeah. You know, I literally want you to No, no. I’m going to I’m going to do No, please. You do it. Please. No. That was so Do you want to do it? Or you could do this way. Yeah, that’s my knife my knife skills are lacking. Conniey’s knife technique is [ __ ] nice. I waste a lot of time. It’s like I’ve got a a noisy bat in my batting stance. I like move a lot. That’s your noisy bat right there. Well, don’t I wasn’t on your shoulder right now. I bet you’d be cutting so clean. Oh my god. You’d be flying without me. Just do it. Just do it. You’d be flying to the moon without me. Are these good, Tommy? Uncle Tommy, do these look good? Perfect. They’re perfect. Yes. Yes. No. Danny, get in there. Good. You got it. And there’s no this these are all going to get reduced and and cooked for a while. So, there’s no perfection. But yeah, I don’t want to Chris’s question, if you dice it, it all gets lost. You want a little length and substance to to the bite. I got you. Good job, Bob. Did going to the San Janeiro Festival change your um opinion on Puerto Ricans? Well, sure. I was going to ask you a recipe on sausage and peppers. Sure. What do you think of ours? What do you think of the Not enough of our famous of our one of our most famous principalities? No, the uh it was more like um it was more like a diner style. Like the idea of it was nice. There was absolutely nothing interesting about it. That’s fine. Nothing really. And Tommy, what are you going to do to make this interesting? Uh, God, you guys really are like a drunk married couple. It’s like It’s like we just [ __ ] and only one of us came. Yeah. So, you want to stop right now? Yeah. Do you want to stop right now? Well, I know Dan and Katie are coming, but do you just want to fine, whatever, cook. Do do whatever your cute [ __ ] is. Whoa. Throwing stuff at me. All I’m saying is I’m cutting some nice [ __ ] These are nice. And also stack. Good job, Chris. We’ve always said he’s a five tool player. I’m a bit of a glue guy. You are 100%. 100%. I wouldn’t disagree with that at all. Absolutely. Keep the locker room together. I wouldn’t argue that in a second. I think it does come at his cost. You know, sometimes I think we leave you on the ice a little too long. I think sometimes, you know, I think we should start putting you on a pitch count. That’s right. You left a big chunk restriction. That’s for you cuz you’re doing it so smooth. Oh my god. You didn’t even notice what you just did. You But you reached out as I was cutting. I almost stacked. How dangerous is that? It probably looked pretty dangerous. Play it back in slow motion. I got it. You guys have a bathroom. Sexual tension. Does that that get you all hot that I was dodging your knife? I love this. What do you think? Should I do a second second onion? Are we Am I putting these in the wrong spot? Where am I? No. They’re all going to go in the same time. Why do you think making a bits uh cuz you want the body? Cuz it’s long sausage. It’s a long roll. It’s a It’s a sausage. I know. But I like when it you can just take little bites and a big onion doesn’t tag along. No, it’s going to shrink. These are half. It’s It’s a half the circumference. Good. Yeah. That didn’t make any sense. Shut up. It’s half circumference. Double it. Don’t cut it. Double it. Cut it again. No, double it. What’s this? Parsley. No. Oregano. Aha. It is. Bought enough bags of this. Yeah. You just you shake it. Bought enough. It’s good stuff. Bless your titties. What? Bless organo. It’s This is a pure [ __ ] thing. Yeah. It’s It’s almost like, you know, how the Pope just tosses that young. I’m Italian, but you make me feel not Italian at all. You are Italian. I’m I mean, I’m only half. I know. Really? Yeah. I’m 3/4. I’m more than you. You are. Give me that shirt. I’m a frog. That shirt [ __ ] rules. [ __ ] up everybody. No, I um I just don’t ever I feel like there’s like a culturally Italian that I missed out on. Well, you got lucky. There you go. Shut up. Shut up. Guy has watched the Sopranos twice. Sunburn from 8:00 p.m. Shoot last night. I also used to tan. I used to be like this. Yeah. And then I stopped going outside. I discovered the internet and now I look like this. Cuz you look like a We have an indoor Italian and an outdoor Italian. This is I want to pick her up by the back of her neck. The indoor ones are pretty good. Outdoor ones get a little kinky. I don’t know. Sometimes they go for three days. You don’t see them, you know. They just want their space. Blue Jays hate them. Squeeze this whole thing into your mouth right now. What’s up? I’m Dan Soder and this is tomato paste. No. Why not? I’m running through the San Festival going on. Shake the meat. I did shake the meat. I’m coming back from shaking the meat. It already is. I just got back from shaking the meat. I’m asking you to make some bits. Come on. You got some loose shorts on. Shake that meat. Just me. [Laughter] Clang around a little bit, young man. Oh my god. Look at you jiggling that pan. Okay. Nice. This doesn’t get hot. It’s metal. I didn’t I’ve never seen the AGM cook. He does whatever needs to want me. This is what happens when there’s an ice raid on the kitchen and then the baker goes, “I’m making sausages.” I go, “All right, I got your own burnouts. I’m on the I’m on the grill. I cannot do the schedule without the line cook. I cannot do the schedule without the line cook.” How many reservations we got? [ __ ] dude. We got 70 on the books. They just [ __ ] I’m going to make a little bit of [ __ ] Oh, no. Nicotine toy. We’re cutting food. Get a squeaky toy. Mario vape is squeaky. That’s a squeaky. Dude, get your smoke. Binky. Wait, are you chopping them up more? He didn’t like the ones I did. You’re making them different. No, I’ll make it difficult. It’s a man’s world. He says bits can’t work. I said bits can work. So now we all have to agree with you. No, no, no, no, no. Look how much you got out of Can I get you for a sec? This episode’s brought to you by Spring Lounge. Spring Lounge. So, what if a kid’s got a baseball game? [ __ ] him. Probably better for him. He’ll have another. And so will you. Well, that’s great. That would have a perfect dad. He’s going to play better without you here. I’m going to hit this little stress out. It’s called motivation. My mom was around and never went to my Delazes pan with a little white wine. All right. All right. Did you want our permission? No. I just want you to This is what happens with sweet women. My My girl does the same thing. When she’s around animals, they start getting anim animalistic. Feral. You see how she’s talked to me? Yeah. So good to She said, “So good to see you.” I’m telling you right now, the woman I woke up with this morning was a little geisha. It wasn’t me. She did a little She did some I slept on the couch. She a little crazy how quick they flip. When I woke up, she said, Rub your feet. She said, “Rub your feet.” I said, “Get out of here.” Hold on. Now this one. This kick the door. This jersey turn pike. Get in. We’re cooking. What day is [ __ ] No, seriously. Whose seltzer is this? So you So this is to get all that [ __ ] out of it. All the fun. Yeah. All the flavor. Yeah. What are you going to do to take this to the next level? That’s right. Same question. That’s what I’m saying. Yeah, he’s in the middle of that speech, I think. You’re making us so tiny. You went so ro. I know. What the [ __ ] are you doing? Are you seeing what he’s doing? Who’s your Chris? Um, is it me? My Are you my Chris? Am I Tommy? Dog. Yeah, this is I think our dog is I think our dog is both our check his butt for poop. I just did that before I left the house on our Chris. This is like I’m not changing anything. I’m doing a little side project. It’s so [ __ ] up. This is America’s test kitchen. America’s test kitchen. America number one test kitchen. The glazing looks like it was a success. Yeah. So, you’re keeping all that meat flavor. Yeah. Without losing it. Uh which is great for the the griddle when you when you go to actual uh a festival itself. All the meat oils and juices are cooking into the peppers and onions. What? Just keeping all the meat flavor without losing it. This is a funny sense. Yeah. See, this is where spring lounge becomes a problem. Yeah. You’re cooking a penis themed meat with a with a with a day drunk Chris. Well, I think we’re having a good time. Why did he Why did he do that? Why did he do that? What? Cuz he’s a [ __ ] absolute. Look at all this. Yeah, you didn’t get any red ones. This is Chris. You told me not to. This is Chris. Grab some of those. You’re going to be That’s what you were do. I thought you were going to do it to everything. I’m so sorry. I would never take something like I’m going to throw these into your pile. It’s just little bits. No, he wants to chop those up into small ones in his little pile. I want him to have all the colors. You know when you bite into it and the whole onion comes and Yeah, I get that. You just want You need sharper teeth. That’s a good note. You know, stronger sizers. Can you sharpen teeth? Yeah. Oh, yeah. I’m sure dentists are doing crazy [ __ ] these days. Oh, yeah. Most people diamonds if you want. Most people underneath there. Are they sharp though? They can be. They’re sharp. Those are little glass. Those things are little like myrtle teeth. Yeah. Look at that color. Look at that. That’s all for the meat. Wa. That’s sick. Smell it. I can’t smell. He doesn’t have a sense of smell. You don’t know that. You really just walked up to a blind man and said, “Take a look.” Wait, what? Yeah. Since co I don’t have the smell. It’s gone. Completely gone. It sucks. No. Ladies, it’s a superpower. What are you doing here? I wasted [ __ ] Yeah. Why do you think I brought her? She’s my nose. That’s right. I’ll be smelling on his behalf. Let me get another one. Can I get a second whiff on behalf of Dan? Can I get a second? Thank you. Dan likes that very much. Yeah, dude. I turned her into 2021 turned her into a fart monster. Only time I know she rips is when I can hear it. Well, now I’m like out in the world acting the same way cuz you spent so much time in the house and I’m like going serious being like, “Hey guys and like Meanwhile, I’m just facing it.” Tom, do you want any garlic? It would be funny if that was just a secret. Yeah. He’s like, “I can’t smell it. Just tell her I can’t.” So she’ll let him loose. So she’ll she’ll be uninhibited in her tootses. Oh, did you have a [ __ ] protein shake? So this is what you want to do. Oh, you went to Benuan. Oh, do you have that butterscotch from Van instead? Nothing. What you mean? How’s Austin you guys? Speaking of co guys, I just miss you. I just need What do you think of women? Guys, let’s bring it up. Who you got? Kirk or Fuentes? Who’s the real American? So, it’s not good. Sausage and peppers. Yeah. No, dude. I I love that we get you on these every other weekends like divorced dads. Yeah. I like that you guys come back up to the Northeast just for a visit. Just to share on our festivals and eat our sausages. The festival was great. Festival was fun. No, I’m sure this is I’m sure sausage and peppers is great at 103 Texas heat. No, we went on a ferris wheel in Austin and we did the the squirt gun thing where you throw through the little Italian. Not in Austin here. Goddamn right. What’ you get? Touch that. What’d you get? Huh? Uh, an Italian monkey. Okay. Yeah. Jesus Christ. She’s right here. Red. It’s like we never But her but all white. Yeah. It’s like marrying a woman. You don’t have to say it to her. What a gift, man. Congrats, by the way. Thank you. Eventually. You captured an Italian monkey. You’re good, dude. Never. We’ll do it eventually. Coming up on year four of being engaged. Yeah. Well, isn’t that [ __ ] annoying when everyone’s like, “What? What’s Let what’s That’s me. It’s my fault. I don’t plan. I’m not a planner. I don’t like planners. So, we’re very stressful. We’ll do it eventually. We’ll do it eventually.” So, why do I need to tell you? Yeah. Right. Exactly. Yeah. It’s crazy. Stop asking me. Nobody really asks. It’s okay. People have been pretty kind about it. Oh, they actually did. Are you stressed out? It’s a lot. It’s a lot. You know, Michelle Yo was engaged for 10 years. Great. And she won. Yeah. This is Did you notice today? I absolutely thought about it. That’s [ __ ] insane. You said it and it happened. She punched me right in the face. Yeah. No. Middle of the 4 p.m. dead. Just suck. No, dude. Does this not work? We do a joke thing where she will suck the bridge of my nose. This is terrible. This I hate that this is happening. And it’s a joke and I’ll go suck me. She’s like kissing me and she’ll suck the bridge of my nose and its I don’t just I just like on it. It feels so good. You can breathe so good. I can breathe so good. Chris gets it. I He might be the assistant general manager. He might not give you the schedule you want. He might put you on Saturday brunches, but he gets nose temple sucks. It feels incredible. It just it happened to bruise me today. It’s like a nutty because yesterday he was like, “Keep going. Keep going.” And I was like, “It’s going to leave a mark on your face.” And then it did. And I woke up. I got out of the shower. Holy [ __ ] Going to work. You’re so good. What do you look like? What the [ __ ] Oh my god. She punched you so hard your your voice got higher. Ow. You broke my [ __ ] nose, you [ __ ] What are you doing? Hey guys. Hurdle’s got to be like, “What the [ __ ] are you doing?” That’s most of the time walks into the room and goes, “What are you guys doing?” She’s like, “I’m going back to the office. What the [ __ ] are you two doing? You guys are [ __ ] in the head. You guys are weird. Tom, this smells now. See, your mouth smells amazing. This looks like uh like hamster food. Yeah. Do you have a small mouth? You got hamster food, dude. I I actually You just got a little pile. Yeah. Look at what What are we talking about? Why does he have this little pile? You ever bite into an onion and the whole thing comes out? You’ve said that and once maybe. But most I think we’re finding a traumatic experience for Chris. But this is like too much relish. You’re not going to have room for it. You’re not going to be able to make room in the when people wash their hands 500 times. Yeah, this actually is making sense if you saw the germ race. It’s the opposite of Tommy. How are you doing with this? I’m good, man. How are you? I got smash. I watched him check out. Well, I’m not going to put all this on one. Put salt and pepper in this pig. You think you’re going to put all that on one? I’m not. Oh, no. Hold on. Give me a second. We’re going to salt and pepper the the onions and and peppers. And we’re going to do I’m the drunk. We’re going to do one hot and we’re going to do one sph. Okay. So, these are peppers I’m going to add at the very end. Okay. So that we can keep all of this uh natural sweet integrity. Nice. Sick. And then if you want to add this, I’m going to make a sandwich with these beautiful rolls. Sick. And there’s going to be one hot and then one sweet. And I’m also going to add cheese. Oh my god. You bad, [ __ ] Yeah, we went to Yeah. Yeah. You Yeah. Oh, dude. And this is, like I said, adorning the W. I’m going to This is nighting, dude. And they they dust it. The wops just hit the palm. Yeah. And it falls off. I’m wasting so much. Look at this. But I’m only going to add basil. So once once these reduce and once they cook to temp, I’m going to add a little chicken stock, maybe a little tomato paste. Tom, show them how to flip them. They’re not ready to be flipped. There’ll be [ __ ] mayhem, you [ __ ] fool. They’re ready to be flipped. What are you crazy? They’re not ready to be flipped. Good. But Chris is going to flip them if that’s okay. Wo, that’s on the flip. There it is. That was good. I like that. That was pretty good. And he’s going to need you to come in on Sunday because we got We got a private event. We got a private event. Yeah. And it looks like it’s going to be about 15 to 20 people. It’s my stepdaughter’s fifth birthday. I told my [ __ ] wife she could have the restaurant. Look at that. When you chop garlic, your my fingers smell like garlic for like 3 weeks. Isn’t that great? It’s Yeah, I I’ll just be like, “Yeah, try and smell that.” Dan, you he can’t I’m not I’m a vampire. Really, dude? This is real? Yeah. Nothing. He can’t see, dude. She Oh, really? Are you a dog? Yeah. He doesn’t know what colors they are. Oh my god. I know these colors between you two. She took nail polish remover and put it under my nose and I had to like pull my nose out and I barely smell. Every now and then I’ll look over when he’s on the couch and he’ll just be doing this trying to catch smells, dude. No, he just pulls his nose away. Really? Yeah. No, wiped it out after he smelled for [ __ ] years and I used to exhale through my nose and it dulled my sense of smell really bad and then when I got taste so it’s not the whole old my taste is Yeah. I can still I can still taste but it’s lessened. It’s It’s Yeah, but it’s not gone. That’s the thing is I have to take his word for taste and there’s times where I’m like Yeah. Yeah, but like yesterday you saw when we put the magnificent sauce. Magnificent. But when we when I was dipping magnificent sauce, but when I dipped it without it, the waffle fries, I was like, “Oh, that’s what I mean. It can be masked with condiments.” Yeah, babe. I need condiments. Yeah, there’s two things. If I lose my sense of taste and when I can’t throw a football anymore. Yeah. Okay. Wow. Gonzo fully enough. What’s the point? When you can’t Yes. If I found out I had to be gluten-free, my nephew tight spiral. I feel like you’re gonna lose that quick. Not a 10 and out. Not a 10 and out. Okay. Look at me. Not a 10 out. You making nervous. Not a 10 out. All over my shoes. Not a 10 and out. All right. Here we go. I didn’t salt and pepp. Yeah. No, you didn’t. You said it wasn’t ready. Where’s the salt? Are you guys going to go back to flipped and you are you guys going to go back to the spring lounge later today? No. We have to do AY. Oh. Oh my god. So the answer’s yes. And then after that Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, they got [ __ ] broad lights and [ __ ] up at their place. Yeah. You guys just keep going. That’s going to be I’m fantasy. I’m fantasy. Are lights up there? I’m I’m fantasy booking your guys’ day drinking. I go sure you keep it going here a little bit. He’s like, “You know what I would do? Quick 20. Set your alarm. Wake up. Can’t go past 20 or you’re done. Grab a shower beer.” Dan just is like lives through this. Or you just do what you have to do. There was nothing left in that. He want for the joke. I’m going to let him pretend there was one step. Barely anything. It was It was all back. There’s more in there. If you want to get another one. Yeah. You can’t. Yeah. No. The whole thing of almonds. We’re doing it. You cough like a Can I talk to you for a second? Mind if I sidebar real quick? Yeah. Really? Honestly, I love where you’re taking these S&Ps. I just need to jump in real quick. I love I love the place. I love all these flavors you did with these S&Ps. But the bathroom. Yeah, that’s what Katie and I do all the time. Can I talk to you real quick? Tom, you putting salt and pepper on this or not? Yeah, you could salt. There we go. Guys, that was good. I know what the [ __ ] I’m doing. When I say do bits, you do. No, you can’t toss bits like that, kid. Oh, you can toss. Oh, you can toss bits. You’re going to watch me toss. You want your bits to all the bits? Yeah. You want your bit to your bits? Toss the bits, dude. Do the toss. I’ll suck your toss. toss in there. Tommy, don’t be Tommy. What are you going to do? You going to throw it away? You’re going to He had your whole bits in his hand. I wish to hand it to him. He’s got the whole in his hand. He’s got the whole in his hand. He’s got the whole thing. Logan, I’m going to put them in the trash. I got you. Look at the color, Tom. It’s like the same size as the Come on. Come on. You can’t even appreciate that, Chris. That’s like me talking about the smell. That’s true. You just look at all the colors, Tom. Like, what are you talking about? I’m like, “Oh, Katie.” Oh, really? Garlic. Are you catching all that? Oh, man. This is torture for me. Can I get a guy that can’t taste it? You’re going to stand there. I want to cook him something special. You going to stand there and tell me that doesn’t look good? That doesn’t look good. It’s like a salsa. You made a little salsa. Look how big. Did you salt this? Yeah. Watch. I’ll salt it a little more. Dan told me he didn’t want it salted. I You said when he said he’s the way to salt. That’s not true at all. Dan Dan doesn’t like sodium. Salt more. I’m going to add this garlic in a second. Pepper. And I don’t think it’s good. It’s really hot. How’d that go? It’s hot. Yeah. I just want to taste it. How did you bite it? Here we go. A little garlic. So, the reason you do you do it later cuz you don’t want it to burn. You drop a bunch. So much. I did. God damn it. God damn. We can cut it. Yeah. Take a couple more. No. Oh, cut more. I thought you meant off. One more. Please. No. It’s good. It cooks off. Whoa. That paper football. Oh, yeah. That would have been [ __ ] two points. You just got a two-point conversion on that B. I feel bad for you, Dan. Why? I didn’t know. Oh, it’s all right. I gotten used to it. I didn’t know. There’s Would you not have done this episode if you knew that you didn’t have a sense of smell? I I would You just put me on. That’s technically discrimination. I would have brought up that Italian white monkey for you. Yeah. Oh my god. I know. What you say is it’s going to taste so good. Your smell is going to come back. That’d be sick. Here it is. Every once in a while. Every once in a while. I’ve been I’ve been nothing mira baby. Yes. This makes me so nervous watching you do that. Why? You have no faith. You saw me flip. It’s true. No, you’re right. It’s just some of those are so big. I think maybe we do another p one more pass. One more pass. Good job sue chefing. No, I need a little guidance. See, I’m coachable. Yeah. Yeah, we’ve always said that as well. Like this guy over here. Not coachable at all. All right. Do you How often do you cook yourself dinner? Every night? No. No, we only cook like three nights a week. Four nights a week. Only three. Only four. What’s your favorite thing that you make yourself? What’s like Mars? Mars cooking is my favorite because I don’t have to do anything. And it’s you cuz I don’t have to do anything. Was the end of the sentence. It wasn’t that way. I I said it incorrectly, but when you when you cook, you have to taste and it doesn’t it doesn’t hit right. Yeah. When you just sit down and someone just gives you I get that you get the final product. Do you do you ever What is your favorite thing that Tommy makes? Meatballs. Meatballs. Really? Meatballs. What are you using in your meatballs? All three. Yeah. Yeah. That’s the way. How long you been making your own meatballs? I’m dead serious. I laugh because I know you’re dead serious. I haven’t seen you look at me like that. In years. Outside of you going, “Hey man, nice to meet you. What’s your name?” There’s no one. 15 years ago. I haven’t seen you look at me like that. For real. I want you cuz I think that’s like uh I’m jealous of people that can cook and I’m ashamed I can’t. Start start. No, but like to know that you can like that you have a fourseam fast ball of a dish is awesome. Yeah, cuz you’re like I’ll throw that [ __ ] meatball. You’re not catching up. You keep going. The first time you get a fast, you know what I mean? Then you get crazy. Yeah. Then you get absolutely insane. This is chef. You want to try this? No, you I want to watch you dice it. So you you just layer. Yeah. So basically you just roll all I’m ashamed I can’t cook. This is where we start. And you tight roll it. Yeah. And hold like a joint. You pthead. Familiar. You get this. Oh, this you’re going to roll like a joint. Yeah. Not like a good joint. Yeah. Roll it like a joint. Do it on a spring lounge card. A can I tell you guys something more embarrassing that I can’t smell? I don’t know how to roll a joint. Really? No. No. Not to roll a blunt. I don’t know how to roll a joint. For real. Damn, bro. Do you know how to roll a joint? No. Don’t laugh at me. I forgot. You [ __ ] I for We But you’ve been exposed. No, I haven’t. I’m I’m not ashamed of that. Okay. I am ashamed of that. Yeah. Uh Tommy, you want me to cut this up? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I do. So, yeah. Like that? Yep. Hold on. Let me show you how to hold this knife. So you balance it here, your thumb. Great. And your finger. Yeah. And when it’s straight, we all fell for it. You’ll find the weight there. So you hold it here instead of here. Oh [ __ ] Hold it here. Oh, I think I didn’t know that either. Yeah. Run through. But I have listened. Just ride. So he said you hold he said you hold the knife right here. Yeah. Till you find the weight. You can balance it. So you can Okay. Sick. Yeah. Like hot. Or just com. You’re only doing and then get for it. Then get the knuckles. Get the knuckles out. So you protect your fingers. Knuckles. Are you doing the knuckles? That’s sick. Like you get the the tips of your fingers. Grab the knuckles out. Is this sexy? Does you like when they do this? Would you [ __ ] me? Would you Would you [ __ ] me? I go, did you give her two Celties? Did she have two Celties? I would [ __ ] me. Did she have two Celties? Whoa. How did that happen? Perfect. Danny, perfect. Danny, Chris going to do his what? Later. His bits. That’s so cute. Later. Damn, that’s horrid. A lot harder than I thought. It is not coming out in little pieces. A whole stick. There’s a stick. Hold on. Stick. Keep going. This is like the weed I used to smoke in high school. Just like when you watch someone do a kip up and you go, I can do that. And then you get on the ground, you go, how the [ __ ] Yeah, that’s good. Spring had to bite into whole chunks of that. That’s good. It’s going to be nice. It’s going to be nice. Oh, look at this. Oh, what a pile of taste. Just put that right in your mouth. Yeah, we’ll reduce this. Oh, it’s actually good. Takes a second. For what? The oregano. I thought it sucked for a second. Why didn’t I do what you did? Why did I fall? Why did you do that? He’s been day drinking. I know. No, it’s good. Just wait. No, I don’t think it is. Chris, I hate to disagree with you. I watched her reaction. I do not think she enjoyed it. The flavor of oregano is good, but putting an entire dried pot of it in your mouth is not. Just let it sit for a second. Uh, try it. No, I’m good. Why? Cuz the show is about to What’s gonna happen with the pile? Try it. I’m gonna throw it in after and try to poke. I’ve tried drugs. Okay. I think now I get my my nose breaks window. Oh yeah, dude. That’s how I fly. Oh yeah. What are you What are you priming me? About to get weird. Are you about to suck me in front of all these people? They suck. It’s annoying. It’s a problem. Lips over the teeth. Well, they’re not. So, because it’s electric, there’s no equal heat. So, it’s like burning in corners where I don’t want the the sauce to burn. And then that that leads into the the whole cooking process. Who cut this extra bit? I did. Cuz I thought it’d be nice garnish. Tell me who do you think? Come here. Look at these guys. You guys bring me back in just when I think you’re bringing me back in. Look at this love. [ __ ] All right. There’s no serrated knife. Semolina. What do we got? Is this a Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. That can’t be. What can’t be? There’s no serrated knife. It’s got to be over here. And it is. Wow. My god. He planned all He planned all of this. He has I shouldn’t have pissed. He woke up. I’ been, dude. I’ve been up. Just people are starting to find. I’ve been up, [ __ ] I’ve been here. This ain’t a text kitchen. This is the final Toronto. Look at that. Great slice. I I know you’re just casually doing this. The kid the kids got great slice. Talk to me about olive oil cuz I feel like in New York there’s a million places that are like Don’t even get me started, my man. this is your time to people that’ll charge so much for a bottle that I’m like I don’t think this is because it’s better olive oil. I think it’s cuz you’re trying to get New York women to buy this thing. We’re going to link this to the San Janeiro episode cuz we’ve learned a lot through his cousin Sean at the One Bite Festival we just filmed a couple days ago. Yeah. There’s two there’s two things that are blatantly robbery to to Americans and it’s olive oil and San Marzano tomatoes. Yeah. And they identify on the can when it’s genuine and from a certain region. And if it’s not, it’s just all [ __ ] They lie to you. Really? Take it from [ __ ] It has to say D. Yeah. What you want, not WPO without What you want is first cold press and you want it from the same like farm or estate. That’s like ideal. If you can get it all from the same region, that’s normally what you get. And that’s what the DOP, that’s like the date of press, I assume. I think it’s uh it’s some Italian thing of like uh it’s a declaration of origin or something like that. Okay. Okay. You slice that bread so well. First cold press. Such a good slice of bread. Confirm that it’s the same from the same region. A lot of times they’ll have a stamp on it that has like a [ __ ] blown away by the bread getting sliced. These guys are acting like I’ve never seen that harvested. You never been around sliced bread. Sure. Seems pretty good. That’s kind of nice. Nice. But like when you’re cooking with the oil, you can use like shitty olive oil, right? You don’t have to buy like high quality olive oil for the actual oil. How dare I? Which way? No, you got to get you got to get the best all the time. all the time in it. You got to use the expensive one. I use the expensive one for when I make a mess on a plate and I just put all the oil and the and the salt. You do better than and the garlic salt order bread and then you dip it in and you It’s great. Those plates [ __ ] up. Little side plates of oil. Yeah, man. Little bit of Romano cheese. That’s me cooking. I’m cooking. I’m banging this this spoon on my hand. About to put two more rings on that finger. Stack them up. I’m going to stack it till you have no finger left. Okay. Can I drain some of the juice into that? I can eat this entire part. Just do it right now before they get to it. Sorry, guys. Where’s the cheese? The [ __ ] goal line’s right here. The goal line’s right [ __ ] there. I’m going to lose my business. This is all the cheese we’re doing. Just this much cheese. That’s it. For the four of us grown human adults. There’s a There’s You wouldn’t believe how much flavor is in that cheese. I want to I want to preface that. Like I I’m actually elevating just the classic sausage and peppers. Yeah. I’m putting some herbs. A lot of people do that, but I I also put in some um I forgot the tomato paste. Don’t worry about that. Yeah. I put in a little squirt before everybody. Just all gone. It’s all gone. So, we’ll do one just regular. I’d like to do one with with cherry peppers. Little dish mustard on one. And I put some mustard out there. Dress it up, dude. Dress up however you want. I say I say we dress. Let’s dress dress it however you want to dress it up. Yeah. And let’s uh let’s make some [ __ ] take some chances. Take some lingerie. You can maybe rained in a little bit. Look, the fun part about cooking is taking risks. Cute. Really cute. It really just is. It’s really cute. If you’re going to play a Stuff Island restaurant, you are about service first. No, service is last. Service is last. Flavors first. They walk in. What’s this guy’s [ __ ] problem? Why is this guy weird? These are cherry peppers. When were you supposed When were you supposed to add the uh two fingers in there tomato paste? Gynecologist. We’re going to throw it out. I know. I know. But just watching you do that was hard. I mean, it’s like that’s I had a guy in my jar like that before. [Laughter] That is so funny. Call that really [ __ ] got me. Calling your [ __ ] a jaw. I’m not a guy. I’m having a guy in my jaw like that. Yeah. Oh, and then I And then I took her out of the wild. I took this. What a beautiful stamp out of the wild. And I put I put a I put a cap on that jar. There are times it’s sealed. And he goes, “There are times when people meet my girl and they go, you did it. Mhm. That that was it.” Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. You did it. Absolutely. And that [ __ ] Stop. It’s so scary the way you cross them. Yeah. Sick. It was pretty sick. Sam wave the samurai. It’s pretty sick. Yeah. This how we cut to Welcome to Look at Dish. Welcome to Look at Dish. I can’t write anymore. Did you want to toast one? Yeah, we could toast one if you want. We got an extra one. Let’s [ __ ] toast it. Toast it with the cheese on it. Toast it with the [ __ ] cheese. [ __ ] You going to [ __ ] toast it with the [ __ ] cheese on it? Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I’m going to toast it with toast. You going to [ __ ] toast it with some [ __ ] cheese on it? Yeah, I bet you’re going to [ __ ] What? You want tomato paste to watch with a [ __ ] [ __ ] D. Uh, you could just toast one of these that’s already cut. After this. All right, let me let me address Let me just dress it up, man. You We just have like a bread fight. Knives are making me so Look, we’re not using the M knives anymore. It’s all the fun of knives. Oh my god, Chris, you were supposed to put all the knives down fight. Look at this. Oh my god. Two side by side. Yeah, I think we do that. Let me tell you right now. I think we do this. Life is sweet when you come down. Sweet and spicy. Or you going with I think I’m I’m trying to find just spice and spice. The one you had was spicy. The pink ones, right? Yeah, these are all spicy. Yeah. Spicy spice. Spicy spice. Look at these. We’ll go spicy slice. End of these looking like an uncircumcised dick. This is nuts. Hey, what’s up? Hey, Dan. Please. Sorry. Sorry. The my mother had the decency to give me a fireman helmet. You’re welcome. You’re welcome, Katie. I went through pain for you. Mutilated my child. Mutilated my penis so that you could have a nice helmet. Yeah, you could have a nice grip. It is a nice helmet. Damn. Troll it. Yep. Yeah. Doubling up the cell siege. I mean, this one makes sense, right? I think you can go two heavy, one in the back. Yeah, it’s crazy. I like that move. I’ll be I like that move. Maybe there. There you go. Beautiful. Yes, chef. Guys, can you can you do me a little infield shift? Can Can you get the [ __ ] out of here? No. Chop him up. What? That’s his own thing cuz he chopped up his We’re seeing a pattern here with Chris. You like bite-sized food. You’re a nibbler. We get it, dude. Where do you see Chris the nibbler? Chris the nibbler. Coc the nibbler. No, I take big bites, but then the big my bites is small. I take big bites, but these bites are small. Look at this. It’s delicious. Got to throw it all away. I said it. I didn’t even mean to say the name of the thing. I said it. Isn’t it nice? She ready. Chris, what do you got? Hey, bud. What you digging around at? Yeah. Somebody keep an eye on Chris toast. I was trying to toast some stuff. Hey, buddy. Maybe we get away from the oven after the spring lounge. Hey, buddy. I know you’re up early. Well, we’re a little lounged out, aren’t we? Hey, buddy. You got time at the screen lounge where they stopped us from understand I know you want to nap but dad’s going to nap with you. Dad’s going to nap with you. We’re all going to nap. We’re all going to nap. That’s crazy. It’s going to be fine. How who knows what those symbols are. Tommy, which of these symbols means toast. I think it’s that top one. I think he’s kind of doing something right now. Painting your masterpiece, dude. [ __ ] knuckleheads. Thank you. Over here going, “What does this do? How do you care? They got some sandwiches. Crazy. Can you imagine? Just [ __ ] sick, [ __ ] That’s convection with the broil. You making guesses? Yeah, that’s got to be. Here’s the thing. The first bite has to be Yeah. Look at this. He’s building it for the first bite. Damn. It’s real construction. Damn. Do you have any butter? You guys got any mac and cheese? Like you guys you guys got cereal? I love the [ __ ] I love I love seeing people watch Chris do this for the first time. What is now? What do you think? They’re going to get mad about me and all this. Is there a Pizza Hut close? You guys want to order some Dominoes? I won’t tell. You guys going to go for a midday cheeser’s over. So, I’m going to make some garlic. Look at the Honestly, Chris, when you chopped up, I was going, “What are you doing?” But now I’m seeing what you got. I was very proud of him. I’m seeing the vision firsthand. What’s that? Butter. It’s more than the Oh, I got right here. He doesn’t listen. You want You want one of these? Yeah. That was your job in the kitchen. Yep. It’s gradeed Parmesan cheese while watching WCW’s Saturday Night Wrestling. Cut my knuckles a lot on these right here. Hurts. Is this true? Yeah, I sort of got it. My mom used to make me grate Parmesan cheese while I was watching pro wrestling. Why? We did it while we were watching the Phillies in the World Series. Yeah, up in the Catskills house. It was great. Phillies better go back and win it this time, [ __ ] What do you mean? Cuz last year we were bummed cuz we love the Phillies. She’s a Red Sox fan. I’m a Giants fan. But this is a banger about bangers. Nice or dice, either is nice or [ __ ] banger about bangers. Soda is sober but Katie no way. Yeah, it’s a banger. Little hot pepp. This is classic. These ones are going to be cheese with hot pepper. Okay. What about the sp is there a nonsp is there a sweet with cheese? He lost track of the spice in this with hot pepper. Just driving me nuts. What if you don’t like spicy? Where do you go? Are you here? Yeah. She’s going to be sweet. Is there one? Is there one? Throw me Throw me over here. Pepper, though. I can put me Put all the spicy peppers over there. Do you want cheese on that D? Uh, yes, please. Katie, can I do something? Oh my god. If it’s What? If it’s that Yeah. Oh my god. Oh, I’m going to split this one with you, Dan. All right, great. Is that cool? Yeah, absolutely. Oh, holy the [ __ ] Oh my free right now. What the [ __ ] are you doing? Oh my god. That’s a boy. Thomas Abraham Lincoln. It has pepper in it. What did you do? Can we cheers? Cheers. Bump sandies. Bumping sandies. Cheers, baby. This is awesome. Mhm. But it’s like purple. Yeah. All right. Open up that Dijon blue. It’s so good. the pepper with the onions. I know I’m missing my smell, but dude, my taste is working. Brother, I’m practicing driving, brother. Light years better. I’m going to have to have a whole car. This is I’m going to fill my butt with this. That’s the most important thing. Chris, we had this yesterday. Get me a [ __ ] goatee. The difference, it’s light years. It’s remarkable. Oh, [ __ ] dude. There’s a juiciness to it. It’s unbelievable. Yo, with the mixing of the flavors. Yeah, it’s really good. I can’t wait till you guys try this. Crazy. Holy [ __ ] That’s [ __ ] good. It’s so good. This is the first time you make this or you make this a lot? No, I made this once before. Really? Yeah. This is [ __ ] Who only makes sausage and peppers one time? One time. Jesus, Tommy. That’s like throw me a little Dijon. The thing is with sausage and peppers, you want to make it simple, but you also want to make it flavorful cuz the sausage is the star. Like a like your cousin was talking about the pizza where the tomato is the star. The sausage, you’re right. It’s like got a [ __ ] backing band with the peppers and the onions. Yeah. Yeah. The full Vegas show. Take a little dip. Oh yeah. Just just touch it on the Take a little bit. Take a little bit. Oh, [ __ ] There you go. I went my whole career without eating a hot dog on camera. I got you. I tricked you, [ __ ] [Laughter] Watching it go in and detonate in Tommy’s brain is amazing. I got to drop down like a little Djon. I got those black. I’m behind you. I’m in Vegas. Here comes Holy [ __ ] That’s good. [ __ ] mind. There’s one thing I’ve learned about you. You’re out of your [ __ ] mind. What? Yeah. I don’t know. Just the way you do everything. The way you approach it all is you’re out of your mind. I like It’s my brand of crazy that I really respond to. Yeah, it’s our brand, but it’s I mean reckless. Oh, reckless. Oh my god. Do you have them in yours? And cherry pepper. Yeah. Mhm. Yeah. Unbeliev. Mhm. Do you mind tipping that a little something? Thank you, sir. Great. That’s a good Oh, yeah. This is [ __ ] great. Damn. Damn. This is tasty. Do you uh do you want to do you want to say anything? You want to plug anything? Do you want to um gut watch stuff island? Yeah. Watch what the meal get you get you a hard plug for the podcast. Join the Patreon. Mhm. The garlic bread is almost done. Oh, good. I’m on tour dance doing that dance uh golden retriever of comedy tour going on now. dancer.com for tickets. Please buy tickets. It’s a fun show and um J uh Casuals, it’s a podcast, a sports podcast. That’s my podcast. Also have a radio show, but that’s not Pro fan service. Thank you. Mad Dog Radio, but subscribe to Casuals. My podcast. My podcast. Hey, my friend Chris is going to show you his garlic bread. Okay. And you better be nice. This is an after credit scene. This is like when you go stay through the credits. No, Chris. I’m not going to lie. This garlic bread is going to [ __ ] slap, dude. I’m excited, dude. You He just Kaiser says us the whole episode. He’s like, I don’t know. Cooking’s weird. Oh, that’s good. Let me get one. Let me get one good one. Let me get one good one. Oh. Oh my god. No, I didn’t. No. No. Yeah. Well, you like it’s fun. I know. Dan went it. I didn’t want. Yes, you did, dude. Check the camera. So, the garlic’s raw. Oh, yeah. You didn’t cook the garlic. This is great. No, this is [ __ ] great. The man a pan de cake is mate. The plate. Chris going to get that bread. Chris going to get that bread. This is a banger about bangers. Slice or dice. Neither is nice a [ __ ] banger about bangers.