Life or death, which one would u choose to save your life? I am going Italian. Not sure where this ad is, I would guess late 50s or early 60s
by Former_Recording_998
27 Comments
welding_guy_from_LI
Italian ftw
Outrageous-Pizza-470
The Jungle pizza is an abomination. Cocktail fruit, applesauce, and chopped nuts dont belong anywhere near a pizza.
If I had to choose one I guess the Italian. Anchovies aren’t my favorite but their okay. The Chinese one is also interesting but noodles leaves to much interpretation that I wouldnt risk here. And the Austrian and American ones sounds pretty normal too.
fsckitnet
That’s Portland Oregon for you. Just a little bit weird.
z617_art
Greek, ive had a lobster flatbread before with similar ingredients and it was good
Unstoppable_Cheeks
what the fuck is the jungle pizza who would do that
Phaaze13
I would eat several of these, but I’ll try the German pizza first.
Missed opportunity putting gyro meat instead of lobster on the Greek one. I have never seen lobster on the menu at a Greek restaurant here in the U.S., not to say it isn’t common in Greece….
atuan
I’ve said ew out-loud multiple times and it just keeps getting louder
Bones-1989
Can I just not get celery on my pizza please? There’s like 10 good options if you stopped fucking with celery …
gastro_psychic
At least Portuguese pizza on the list. Thank god for that.
PeaTasty9184
I’ll take the German, honestly
waitingtobebannedd
Im going to say that the Austrian and the American pizaas are the only ones that sound edible if you had to eat it the way it comes
williamsdj01
Irish pizza could be good
TraditionPhysical603
A jungle and a kosher
VaelinX
A lot of these are viable depending on sauce and cheese choices. But the problems are largely texture, in that you want a bite of pizza to come off as a bite. This is why celery isn’t usually a good topping as it’s too crunchy or chunky unless cooked a long time. Italian/Austrian/ is just a normal pizza, no risk there.
– Jungle pizza sounds weird if hot… nuts are ok, and I’ve had fruity “dessert” pizzas (arguably not a pizza anymore), but the apple sauce sounds runny
– Noodles on the Chinese sound like a texture problem, but could work if thin and easy to bite through – but noodles on dough is ambitious for even the biggest carb loader
– Frog Legs are more work than they are worth (especially for pizza), and I say that as someone born on the bayou and had a dad who taught me how to gig frogs – the true crime is that there are so many good French toppings that should have been used in its place.
– Celery and carrots are usually too crunchy/chunky, greens like arugula, etc… are usually a better choice, I could see it working if shaved or shredded with a mandoline, but they say “chopped”
CaptSubtext1337
Well it’s called pizza jungle so you gotta try the jungle pizza, it’s their specialty
Servile-PastaLover
I’m going for the Kosher pizza as the most criminal.
Mixing salami and cheese or any dairy product is the exact opposite of kosher.
27 Comments
Italian ftw
The Jungle pizza is an abomination. Cocktail fruit, applesauce, and chopped nuts dont belong anywhere near a pizza.
If I had to choose one I guess the Italian. Anchovies aren’t my favorite but their okay. The Chinese one is also interesting but noodles leaves to much interpretation that I wouldnt risk here. And the Austrian and American ones sounds pretty normal too.
That’s Portland Oregon for you. Just a little bit weird.
Greek, ive had a lobster flatbread before with similar ingredients and it was good
what the fuck is the jungle pizza who would do that
I would eat several of these, but I’ll try the German pizza first.
Irish for me, please. Mmmm, cabbage.
[https://www.wweek.com/restaurants/2020/09/13/what-the-hell-was-going-on-with-this-portland-pizzeria-from-the-1950s/](https://www.wweek.com/restaurants/2020/09/13/what-the-hell-was-going-on-with-this-portland-pizzeria-from-the-1950s/)
Missed opportunity putting gyro meat instead of lobster on the Greek one. I have never seen lobster on the menu at a Greek restaurant here in the U.S., not to say it isn’t common in Greece….
I’ve said ew out-loud multiple times and it just keeps getting louder
Can I just not get celery on my pizza please? There’s like 10 good options if you stopped fucking with celery …
At least Portuguese pizza on the list. Thank god for that.
I’ll take the German, honestly
Im going to say that the Austrian and the American pizaas are the only ones that sound edible if you had to eat it the way it comes
Irish pizza could be good
A jungle and a kosher
A lot of these are viable depending on sauce and cheese choices. But the problems are largely texture, in that you want a bite of pizza to come off as a bite. This is why celery isn’t usually a good topping as it’s too crunchy or chunky unless cooked a long time. Italian/Austrian/ is just a normal pizza, no risk there.
– Jungle pizza sounds weird if hot… nuts are ok, and I’ve had fruity “dessert” pizzas (arguably not a pizza anymore), but the apple sauce sounds runny
– Noodles on the Chinese sound like a texture problem, but could work if thin and easy to bite through – but noodles on dough is ambitious for even the biggest carb loader
– Frog Legs are more work than they are worth (especially for pizza), and I say that as someone born on the bayou and had a dad who taught me how to gig frogs – the true crime is that there are so many good French toppings that should have been used in its place.
– Celery and carrots are usually too crunchy/chunky, greens like arugula, etc… are usually a better choice, I could see it working if shaved or shredded with a mandoline, but they say “chopped”
Well it’s called pizza jungle so you gotta try the jungle pizza, it’s their specialty
I’m going for the Kosher pizza as the most criminal.
Mixing salami and cheese or any dairy product is the exact opposite of kosher.
https://preview.redd.it/40ne9epgpn7g1.jpeg?width=1004&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=eb4f1a17825c6d5330c11bae0f545107b7734618
anchovies are a stand alone pizza topping — you cannot put anything else on an anchovy pizza.
https://preview.redd.it/hrp5jyhvtn7g1.jpeg?width=563&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e719de53a50dbd878162f3af5ac505b7c72e3f32
I’m going with Idiots delight.
This restaurant probably set back international relations by fifty years.
None.
None of them.
FFS none, please.
No joke, I just read this and I’m like a block from there. Thought I was in the r/askportland or r/PDX subs (you should cross post they’ll love it!!)
Fuck it, I’ll try Danish or Greek pizza
UPDATE: [There’s more menu,](https://www.wweek.com/restaurants/2020/09/13/what-the-hell-was-going-on-with-this-portland-pizzeria-from-the-1950s/) an interesting history of the place, and it possibly served “Hawaiian” pizza 5 years before it was “official”
Who would even consider eating most of these! I feel so bad for whoever they had chopping onions all and and into the night
Italian even if I’m not crazy about anchovies. I’d also take the Irish.