We are here today to hear the case for u/DingleBarryGoldwater that the pizza they have in their possession can be determined to be a crime against pizza. The plaintiff/defendant alleges and/or has been accused by other parties that their pizza constitutes a crime against pizza. —
The verdicts in today’s case will be determined by a jury of u/DingleBarryGoldwater’s pizza-appreciating peers, comprised of members of the /r/Pizzacrimes community, as well as visitors from the greater Reddit community, by casting their respective individual votes of either “guilty” or “innocent”, based on evidence brought here today by the plaintiff.
u/DingleBarryGoldwater, who’ll be referred to as “OP”, will plead their case either accusing – or defending – that the pizza in question in today’s hearing is criminal with regards to pizza.
#How to vote as a juror in today’s case:
To select a verdict of **Innocent** – in that no pizza crime has occurred – please **DOWNVOTE THIS COMMENT** —
To select a verdict of **Guilty** – in that a crime-against-pizza is evident beyond a reasonable doubt – please **UPVOTE THIS COMMENT** —
After a period of deliberation – tallying the votes – a final verdict will replace this message with the verdict.
thewookiee34
Bro acts like this js a car without wheels and hitler is forcing him to drive it. Just go to Walmart and say this pizza was defective boom refund.
epidemicsaints
Crazy that the assembly line does not check the weight of each one.
Rich_Prior4656
Forbidden gluten-free pizza
SandiestCow
He wasted all the extra toppings he could have doubled down on
Laosiano
That’s not how it works dude. You just go back to the shop with it, if you want your money back.
J-Di11a
So basically the same as the original crust?
PantsDontHaveAnswers
Dude, manufacturing issues happen. Yeah, there should be quality control checks, but shit happens. Laugh about it and move on.
JD_tubeguy
CPK crust is kinda cardboardy so this works lol.
hustle_krow
Should have transferred the cardboard pizza toppings to the other pizza
GameCounter
Technically the thinnest crust possible.
NoticeImaginary
I’d still eat that. I’ve eaten worse and their pizzas are delicious.
Artevyx
That’s a boneless pizza.
i-like-turtles-4eva
This guy and his video are more annoying than the pizza fuck-up.
RPIL626
I am so outraged. So outraged. Let me first hit record, then I will raise my voice and loudly repeat my point. I am outraged (but, don’t get me wrong, I’m not that fat, just a connoisseur of highly processed frozen shit I feed on from the Walmart).
ConstantSond
for 8 bucks its sad
Tigreiarki
Little Caesar’s from ten years ago has entered the chat.
17 Comments
We are here today to hear the case for u/DingleBarryGoldwater that the pizza they have in their possession can be determined to be a crime against pizza. The plaintiff/defendant alleges and/or has been accused by other parties that their pizza constitutes a crime against pizza.
—
The verdicts in today’s case will be determined by a jury of u/DingleBarryGoldwater’s pizza-appreciating peers, comprised of members of the /r/Pizzacrimes community, as well as visitors from the greater Reddit community, by casting their respective individual votes of either “guilty” or “innocent”, based on evidence brought here today by the plaintiff.
u/DingleBarryGoldwater, who’ll be referred to as “OP”, will plead their case either accusing – or defending – that the pizza in question in today’s hearing is criminal with regards to pizza.
#How to vote as a juror in today’s case:
To select a verdict of **Innocent** – in that no pizza crime has occurred – please **DOWNVOTE THIS COMMENT**
—
To select a verdict of **Guilty** – in that a crime-against-pizza is evident beyond a reasonable doubt – please **UPVOTE THIS COMMENT**
—
After a period of deliberation – tallying the votes – a final verdict will replace this message with the verdict.
Bro acts like this js a car without wheels and hitler is forcing him to drive it. Just go to Walmart and say this pizza was defective boom refund.
Crazy that the assembly line does not check the weight of each one.
Forbidden gluten-free pizza
He wasted all the extra toppings he could have doubled down on
That’s not how it works dude. You just go back to the shop with it, if you want your money back.
So basically the same as the original crust?
Dude, manufacturing issues happen. Yeah, there should be quality control checks, but shit happens. Laugh about it and move on.
CPK crust is kinda cardboardy so this works lol.
Should have transferred the cardboard pizza toppings to the other pizza
Technically the thinnest crust possible.
I’d still eat that. I’ve eaten worse and their pizzas are delicious.
That’s a boneless pizza.
This guy and his video are more annoying than the pizza fuck-up.
I am so outraged. So outraged. Let me first hit record, then I will raise my voice and loudly repeat my point. I am outraged (but, don’t get me wrong, I’m not that fat, just a connoisseur of highly processed frozen shit I feed on from the Walmart).
for 8 bucks its sad
Little Caesar’s from ten years ago has entered the chat.