Less than a day ago, a woman shared photos of her “perfectly acceptable” home-cooked meals, which her boyfriend rejected and left uneaten. The post racked up over 30,000 comments in the first 17 hours because people have thoughts on this allegedly “picky” eater’s real MO.
The post in Reddit’s r/mildlyinfuriating details how the meals themselves weren’t controversial. Think classic, family-friendly comfort food: pan-fried pork chops, roasted vegetables, hearty plates that many commenters said they’d be thrilled to come home to. Her kids eat the food happily. She cooks for church gatherings and family events. No one else complains.
Her boyfriend, however, has rules. So many rules.
He can’t eat chicken for dinner if he had it for lunch. He doesn’t like onions, tomatoes, fish, most vegetables, leftovers reheated in the microwave, or anything vaguely “Asian.” He eats only vanilla ice cream. He doesn’t cook. When presented with dinner, he’ll often pass — then DoorDash fast food instead, apologizing while doing it.
The reaction was swift and nearly unanimous: Stop cooking for him.
“More than acceptable is an understatement,” one top commenter wrote. “You learned your lesson. No more cooking for him.” Another put it more bluntly: “You’re cooking like a wife. He’s acting like a customer.”
What’s notable isn’t just the pile-on — it’s why so many people saw red flags where the original poster felt frustration. Commenters repeatedly pointed out that this isn’t really about taste preferences. Picky eaters usually stick to a short list of safe foods; they don’t constantly change the rules. They don’t reject meals they explicitly said they’d try. And they don’t expect someone else to shoulder the mental load of planning, shopping, cooking, and cleanup — only to opt out at the table. Hello, this is about control… and it’s a major red flag.
Cooking isn’t just an act of service; it’s labor. Invisible labor, often unpaid and expected, especially from women who are told they’re being “good partners” by anticipating needs and accommodating preferences. Many commenters bristled at the idea that she was bending over backwards to feed a grown man who couldn’t — or wouldn’t — feed himself.
“You’re not his mom,” became a recurring refrain.
Others warned about the long game. If this dynamic continues, what lesson does it teach her kids about gratitude, effort, and respect? Several women chimed in to say they’d lived this exact scenario — and that over time, the constant criticism drained the joy out of cooking altogether.
The original poster admitted as much in the comments, writing that she loves to cook, but his reactions have begun to take the pleasure out of it. The most surprising part for her, she said, was how kind strangers were — how many people offered validation, encouragement, and even jokes about lining up to be her new boyfriend just for the food.
That kindness, commenters noted, might be the biggest tell of all. When thousands of strangers treat you with more appreciation than the person at your own dinner table, it’s worth asking why.
As a working mom, I don’t cook nearly as much as I once did — my husband actually handles dinner far more often than I do — but when I do cook, it’s always met with gratitude. Not because the meal is flawless or restaurant level, but because someone took the time to plan it, make it, and get it on the table amid the daily chaos of everyday life. That’s the baseline in our house. Care is acknowledged. Effort is appreciated. And if a meal isn’t a favorite, that doesn’t turn it into a referendum on the person who made it. It shouldn’t. And the expectation shouldn’t be radical.
So if it were me? I’d be finished cooking for this dude. Right after I told him to move out.
Dining and Cooking