Photo: dishgen, food.recipes.daily, Mia Mercado, vegan_veganlife; Videos: amberrecipes, protein_cottage_kitchen
Just thinking about AI puts a bad taste in my mouth. At its most insidious, it’s polluting water, proliferating misinformation, consuming jobs, and capitalizing on the fractures in broken systems. At its most irritating, AI is taking all the fun out of our hobbies and drowning our social-media feeds with AI-generated content that’s getting harder and harder to spot. These low-quality, high-volume AI-generated posts, better known as AI slop, are mostly just absurd, like something out of a dystopian America’s Funniest Home Videos — a lion and dog flipping the bird, an alligator returning human baby — but sometimes they make it into our real offline lives in truly stupid ways. Like, say, a cottage-cheese cheesecake recipe video that, when attempted in an IRL kitchen, results in an inedible, half-baked gloop. Literal AI slop.
Not surprisingly, AI doesn’t have a great reputation in the kitchen. In 2023, a New Zealand grocery chain’s AI mealbot spat out a recipe for “aromatic water mix” when given the ingredients water, bleach, and ammonia. “Aromatic water” is certainly a gentler way to describe what this mix actually makes: deadly chlorine gas. When initially rolled out, Google’s AI summaries gave recommendations to put glue on pizza and eat rocks. Cooking sub-Reddits are peppered with posts lamenting the ubiquity of AI-generated recipes on once-helpful apps like Pinterest. “AI can be a good tool for experienced chefs who can recognize when they are wrong … A beginner may not know if the AI is right or not,” a moderator for r/cookingforbeginners responded to a post asking for the community’s thoughts on AI-generated recipes. As other comments quickly pointed out, the original poster appeared to run an AI-powered recipe generator.
In an effort to put my mouth (literal) where my mouth (metaphoric) is, I spent a week taste-testing recipes from Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok that appear to utilize AI in some capacity (e.g., cheese-pull videos with confusing physics, recipes with contradicting steps, accounts featuring the photo of an AI chef). Exactly how bad could it be? Please consume with caution, and bon appétit.
@amberrecipes
3-Ingredient Cottage Cheese Garlic Breadsticks – Cheesy, Crispy & High-Protein🧄🧀 Cheesy, garlicky, and melt-in-your-mouth delicious—these breadsticks are made with just 3 simple ingredients! Perfect as a quick side, snack, or appetizer that’s keto-friendly and packed with protein. Ingredients (makes 6–8 breadsticks): ½ cup cottage cheese 1 large egg ½ cup shredded mozzarella cheese Optional: ½ tsp garlic powder + pinch of salt Nutrition (per breadstick, approx. out of 8): Calories: 70 kcal Protein: 6 g Fat: 4 g Carbohydrates: 1 g Net Carbs: 1 g Keto | Gluten-free | High-protein Instructions: Step 1 – Prep the Oven Preheat oven to 400°F (200°C). Line a baking tray with parchment paper. Step 2 – Make the Mixture Blend cottage cheese until smooth. Stir in egg, mozzarella, garlic powder, and salt until well combined. Step 3 – Shape the Breadsticks Spread the mixture into a rectangle on parchment paper (about ¼-inch thick). Step 4 – Bake Bake for 15–18 minutes, or until golden and set. Step 5 – Slice & Serve Cut into sticks and serve warm. Optional: sprinkle with extra garlic powder or fresh parsley. ✨ Tips: Serve with marinara, ranch, or garlic butter dip. Add Italian seasoning or chili flakes for extra flavor. Air fryer option: cook at 375°F (190°C) for 8–10 minutes until golden.
♬ original sound – easy recipes – Amber recipes
I found this recipe by searching “cottage cheese recipes” on TikTok and hit the AI-generated trifecta. The audio is AI — both the voice-over and the “crunch” of the food. The visual is AI — is that cheese or dough being pulled apart? And the recipe has inconsistencies — why is garlic an optional ingredient in these garlic breadsticks?
While not entirely true to its three-ingredient name, the recipe is easy to follow. After combining the blended cottage cheese with an egg and mozzarella, I added the optional (???) garlic powder, salt, and pepper. The batter was loose, and my hopes were low. How would this pan of goop become twisted, bready sticks? After baking in the oven for 18 minutes, I sliced the finished concoction into strips.
From left: Photo: Mia MercadoPhoto: Mia Mercado
From top: Photo: Mia MercadoPhoto: Mia Mercado
The result is … absolutely not breadsticks. It’s more like an eggy sheet with herbs. When I tried to twist the strips to resemble the original video, three of them fell apart. They tasted like a weird omelet.
Rating: 0 out of 5 AI-generated thumbs
Instead, try these three-ingredient breadsticks from the Gardening Foodie.
I’m going to need to buy more cottage cheese: AI recipes love cottage cheese, blending everything into a batter, and not giving all the steps. Assembling this one was easy: Put all the ingredients into a blender and pour them into a muffin tin. I halved the recipe, which, in theory, shouldn’t be an issue, but yesterday’s recipe made me dubious of everything. I also used blueberries instead of strawberries, which, again, should be fine, but who knows.
After 22 minutes in the oven, I’ve created something halfway between a pancake and a muffin. They tasted goodish? The texture wasn’t fluffy like the name suggests, but they aren’t rubbery like the egg sheet from yesterday. The cottage cheese was undetectable, but they didn’t really have a flavor beyond the maple syrup and blueberries.
Photo: Mia Mercado
Rating: 2.5 out of 5 thumbs because I did finish all the pancake bites I made, but they look absolutely nothing like the video
For food that will actually look like the picture, try Strawberry Drop Pancake Bites from Jar of Lemons.
On this day, I decided to play with AI-generated fire. There is no way grated zucchini, egg, cheese, and herbs would turn into the crunchy golden rectangles pictured. The recipe said to mix everything into a thick batter — again with the batter! — but I could only achieve a stringy goop. I tried to spread the goop into as uniform a layer as I could, but it was too hard. It is too soon in the week to let a computer bully me into perfectly leveling this goop. I put the lumpy sheet of goop in the oven, hoped for the best, and preemptively ate a handful of Ritz crackers.
After 30 minutes in the oven, the middle was still squidgy, and the edges were burnt to a crisp. I don’t know what to call this, but I did not make crackers. However, I did eat a significant amount of the burnt edges, which tasted a little like the burned cheese in the corner piece of a lasagna.
From left: Photo: Mia MercadoPhoto: Mia Mercado
From top: Photo: Mia MercadoPhoto: Mia Mercado
Rating: 2 out of 5 thumbs because the burnt bits did taste kinda good
AI was likely trying to replicate Danny Seo’s zucchini crackers or these two-ingredient zucchini chips from Kirbie’s Cravings.
As the photos indicate, generative AI does not understand why or when to employ twine. It also couldn’t decide whether the wraps in question were tortillas or pita. In one picture, the wrap has transformed into a sort of tortilla-themed paper. This recipe was significantly more detailed than the previous ones, which made me think it was stolen from an actual food blog. (Hmm, something to look into.) This dish required a lot more prep than I prefer for a weekday lunch — the chopping, the multiple bowls, the cast iron of it all — but that also made it the most promising thus far.
From left: Photo: Mia MercadoPhoto: Mia Mercado
From top: Photo: Mia MercadoPhoto: Mia Mercado
Rating: 4 out of 5 thumbs! It looked nothing like the pictures — and not just because I overstuffed my wrap to the point of the tortilla bursting — but tasted great. I would absolutely make this again. The biggest success so far!
This recipe was most certainly stolen from Minimalist Baker, much of the recipe wording is identical.
I procured more cottage cheese and the will to carry on. However, the AI audio for this video was … challenging. It sounds like someone gumming an old banana directly into a microphone, ASMR style. Fortunately, prep was easy for this one: Put a bunch of ingredients in a blender, top with berries, and ta-da! The batter was promising, but I didn’t anticipate the finished cake looking (or, God forbid, sounding) anything like the video.
After baking for the full 40 minutes, it certainly looked cheesecake-esque! Even after letting it cool for a while, cutting a triangular slice was impossible. However, the edge held together, and it was cooked all the way through. The texture of the crustless-crust edge is good! The middle is … less good. Beyond maple syrup and blueberries, this just tasted like fluffy mush. It’s not cheesecake, but not terrible.
From left: Photo: Mia MercadoPhoto: Mia Mercado
From top: Photo: Mia MercadoPhoto: Mia Mercado
Letting the cake sit in the fridge overnight helped everything solidify and taste a little more cheesecake-y. It was still pretty flavorless but made for a passable cheesecake dip when eaten with graham crackers.
Rating: 3 out of 5 thumbs, but only if you eat it cold the next day
Similar to the more accurately named Cottage-Cheese Berry Breakfast Bake from Farmer Franny.
For my grand AI-slop finale, I followed a recipe from AI recipe generator DishGen, which creates its recipes using large language models like OpenAI and Anthropic. Unlike the week’s previous recipes, which repurposed or completely ripped off existing recipes, this one is definitely an AI-generated original: fettuccine with pineapple-cashew cream sauce. I think I’m gonna die in this house, honey.
Now, I can get behind a Hawaiian pizza, so maybe this will be reminiscent of that? Salty and sweet? Hopefully? Should I just make the chickpea wrap again?? Off the bat, the cashew-cream sauce didn’t give me much hope. My mixture was thin and mostly smelled like garlic and nutritional yeast. After I browned the pineapple, I added the sauce, which thankfully thickened after a few minutes.
Photo: Mia Mercado
All assembled, the dish almost looked like chicken Alfredo, except the chicken was pineapple. The sauce was garlicky and a little sweet, which I don’t mind, but it’s a far cry from a cream sauce. It’s also not as flavorful as other vegan cream sauces I’ve tried, but it was quickish and easy to make. The chunks of pineapple weren’t as jarring as I expected — they added a nondescript texture, kind of like pieces of mushroom, more than any specific flavor. Maybe it would all be better with some pancetta? Bacon bits are vegan, right? AI gun to my head, I could have finished a serving, but I’m not a fan. I don’t know why anyone would make this recipe, unless they had an abundance of soaked cashews and fresh pineapple to use ASAP.
Rating: 1.5 out of 5 thumbs. I’d rather eat this than the egg-sheet breadsticks, but only barely. Also, the combo of garlic, nutritional yeast, and pineapple started to smell oddly seafood-y to me. I accepted defeat and ordered takeout instead.
If this experiment has left me hungry for anything, it isn’t an AI personal chef. The day I started my week of slop, OpenAI shared an update regarding its contract with the Department of Defense, generously adding provisions asking the government to pweeease not use its tech for mass public surveillance and autonomous weapons. My stomach hurts and not just from all the cottage cheese. As a tool for, say, accelerating cancer research, AI certainly has its merits. But should our priority always be optimization? Are we sacrificing taste for the sake of efficiency? For now, if it’s any small consolation, anyone worried about AI taking our place in the office can rest assured it hasn’t usurped us in the kitchen just yet.
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