David Haddad is a health-tech founder and product manager turned creator. He’s now on a mission to teach Dads how to cook with his new company Mister Branzino and the Meal Machine operating system. He runs a newsletter and the Dad Cook Crew community. He’s a loving husband and the father of 1 son. In today’s conversation we discussed:
– How David developed his passion for cooking
– Why Dads often let this important skill go by the wayside
– The PPSCE system for building a weekly meal plan
– Maximizing meals with minimal time
– How to get more Dads comfortable in the kitchen and building confidence
– Sample meal plans that you can get started with right away
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Where to find David Haddad
– Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/davidhhaddad/
– Twitter / X: https://twitter.com/haddadda
– The Meal Machine OS: https://misterbranzino.gumroad.com/l/mealmachine
Where to find Adam Fishman
– FishmanAF Newsletter: https://www.fishmanafnewsletter.com
– LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/adamjfishman/
– Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/startupdadpod/
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In this episode, we cover
[1:44] Welcome
[1:55] Mr. Branzino mission
[4:10] Ethnicity
[7:20] Met partner/tell about son
[8:13] Epic meal for partner
[9:43] Decision to start a family
[10:17] Weaponized incompetence
[16:43] Most surprising thing about becoming a dad
[17:58] Best practice for modeling behavior
[19:13] Advice to past David
[25:09] Approach to food w/son
[30:32] What Mr. Branzino meals does son love?
[34:24] What makes dads uncomfortable in the kitchen?
[37:13] System to teach a dad how to cook
[42:13] PPSCE
[44:30] Mr. Branzino meal plan
[49:29] Where should dads get inspiration?
[54:00] Disastrous recipe
[55:43] Follow along
[56:51] Rapid fire round
[59:52] Thank you
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Show references:
Mister Branzino Recipe Swipe File: https://www.pinterest.com/misterbranzino/recipe-swipe-file/
Mrs. Doubtfire:https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0107614/
Dumb & Dumber: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0109686/
Chef John/ Food Wishes:https://foodwishes.blogspot.com/
Ny Times Cooking: https://cooking.nytimes.com/
Blue Apron Cooking: Blueapron.com/cookbook
Thich Nhat Hanh: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Th%C3%ADch_Nh%E1%BA%A5t_H%E1%BA%A1nh
Counter stool: https://www.amazon.com/Guidecraft-Classic-Kitchen-Helper-Stool/dp/B00C18NV8C
Instacart: https://www.instacart.com/
Amazon Fresh: https://www.amazon.com/fmc/storefront?almBrandId=QW1hem9uIEZyZXNo
Ted Lasso: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ted_Lasso
Coffee Meets Bagel: https://coffeemeetsbagel.com/
Top Chef: https://www.bravotv.com/top-chef
In n Out: https://www.in-n-out.com/menu
Chick Fil A: https://www.chick-fil-a.com/
Barack Obama: https://www.whitehouse.gov/about-the-white-house/presidents/barack-obama/
Dr. Brazelton’s Books: https://www.amazon.com/stores/T.-Berry-Brazelton/author/B001I9TV4S
Neli deGrasse Tyson: https://neildegrassetyson.com/
Solid Starts: https://solidstarts.com/
Coco: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt2380307/
Cocomelon: https://cocomelon.com/
Mental & Emotional Load Articles:
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20210518-the-hidden-load-how-thinking-of-everything-holds-mums-back
https://www.happiestbaby.com/blogs/parents/mental-load
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/mom-mental-load_l_63f7a67ee4b0616708e04d9a
https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/love-sex/relationships/a23469721/emotional-labour-mental-load/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evidence-based-living/202111/women-carry-most-the-mental-load-running-household
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For Startup Dad Merch: www.startupdadshop.com
Production support for Startup Dad is provided by Tommy Harron at http://www.armaziproductions.com/
David Haddad: I’ve had colleagues of mine show me like the mommy groups on Facebook. It’s the same thing. It’s like, my husband doesn’t do anything. I just wish he would just cook an effing meal or I wish he would just make the lunches or I wish he would just do something. Cause it’s so stressful. And these guys are then wondering like, well, why am I getting divorced? Why is this relationship so strained? And it’s like, cooking seems complicated, but if you do this, it’s going to pay massive dividends on your relationship and like the future of your family. Adam Fishman: Welcome to Startup Dad, the podcast where we dive deep in the lives of dads who are also leaders in the world of startups and business. I’m your host, Adam Fishman. And in today’s episode, I sat down with David Haddad, also known as Mr. Branzino. David is a health tech founder and product manager turned creator, now on a mission to teach dads how to cook. He recently started a company called Mr. Branzino to teach dads how to cook delicious and simple meals in just two hours a week. He runs a newsletter, a dad cook crew, and a cookbook. And a recipe planner called Meal Machine. He’s a loving husband and the father of one son. In our conversation today, we spoke about food, from how he developed his passion for cooking to the relationship between kids and food and his Pisces system for building a weekly meal plan. We talked about why dads aren’t as comfortable in the kitchen and how they can get there. Plus a sample meal plan from one of his most recent weeks. David’s advice can get anyone started right away, becoming a more confident cook. I’ve already tried a few parts of his system in my own household to great effect. I would like to welcome. David Haddad to the Startup Dad show. David, thank you for joining me today. It’s a pleasure to have you here. Thanks, Adam. Thanks for having me. Today we’re going to talk a lot about food and cooking. And for those folks who don’t know you, you also go by Mr. Branzino, which is a brand that you’re creating, a product that you’re creating, Yeah. around food and cooking and helping dads. Thanks Learn how to cook. If I recall correctly, this is not your background. You are not a chef. You did not work at a Michelin star restaurant. So tell me about that. Like, what did you do? And then tell me about the mission behind Mr. Branzino. David Haddad: Yeah, it’s, it’s so funny. No, I’m not a chef, but I have been cooking for 21 years. You know, in earnest, probably I would say like the last like 10, 15, like more seriously, I’ve been cooking and getting more interested in food. But no, so my background is I’m a product manager. I’ve been building digital health products. I’ve had my own companies in this space. I’ve been building in that space and operating in that space for like, 13 plus years, I’ve just been building or a builder. And so the cooking thing has just always been in the background. It’s always been this thing that like people, they didn’t even know that I cooked, they didn’t even know that I had that in my back pocket in terms of my skills. But yeah, so I’ve just been cooking, you know, where did it come from? So my family. is like insane cooks. Like my parents had a cafe growing up. My father was in the import and had some grocery stores in the Bay Area doing like specialty ethnic foods. My mom and grandmother were like phenomenal cooks. My grandmother was a phenomenal cook. My mom is a phenomenal cook. Brothers and sister in laws, uncle, everyone’s just like really good at cooking. So I just kind of grew up doing that. You know, in cooking and I’ve like kind of oriented a lot of my travel. Everything was always been around food. I was selling like specialty ethnic food, specialty food on the internet. And like 2010, doing my first four into e commerce, like playing with Shopify from back in the day. I like had a falafel pop up in LA right before the pandemic and just done a lot of like food projects along the way. So it’s just food has always been in my blood and pulsing through my veins for like the last, you 20 plus years, but yeah, it’s been a journey. It’s always been there and I’m just kind of expressing it right now in a way that I think needs to happen. Adam Fishman: And you mentioned, you know, you were sort of surrounded by this as a kid. Like everyone in your family is kind of into this. You’ve got parents, grandparents, you know, et cetera. And you also mentioned ethnic grocery stores. You sold sort of like specialty ethnic foods online. Like. What ethnicity? I’m racially ambiguous. Yeah, that’s uh, that’s what you’re trying to get at. Yeah, no, no, I mean, I love that racially ambiguous. No, I mean, I guess like, you know, I think there is something about people who come from certain cultural backgrounds or ethnic backgrounds where food is naturally and cooking is naturally more a part of their lives. And so I’m just wondering, like, is that something? That kind of grounded you in that, or was it something else and what lane, I guess, did the family cook in? David Haddad: Interesting. So my heritage is from the Middle East. My mom is from Palestine and my dad’s from Jordan. So I grew up in a, you know, East Mediterranean style of food. So food in the Mediterranean is You know, it’s everything, right? It’s like you eat your breakfast and then you’re like, what are we going to have for lunch? You eat your lunch, but we’re going to have for dinner. You’re not like, you’re always thinking about food. You’re obsessed with food just because of how good the food is. You just sort of like food is like a conversation everyone’s having all the time. So I grew up in that environment. My father was an engineer, was a professor, but he had a cafe and he started a coffee business back in the day. And he was like roasting on the downtimes of like Pete’s coffee when they were in Emeryville, I grew up in the Bay area, you know, so everything was like, food was like part of the household, but it’s interesting, like, even though that like my dad knows how to cook and is a pretty good cook and he used to cook a lot before he met my mom, but you know, I think culturally, I think they kind of took the sort of more traditional middle Eastern sort of like the woman cooks and the man works sort of thing, which is, you know, was very, it’s very common in the U S too. There’s still that, like, kind of that. idea. It’s still very common in the Middle East, but it’s changing. I think that’s changing quite a bit. So yeah, you know, even though that I did grow up in that type of environment, like I grew up in Hayward, California, and that is like a really diverse place. And so like, I grew up with like people from all around the world, especially for people of different ethnicities. Like if you think after like the end of the cold war, like there was a lot of like Russian and ex Soviet immigrants. Immigrants where they came to Hayward as like a landing pad. And if you think about like lots of cultures, they come there and then like, they were at my school. And so like, you know, you would try like Russian food and Polish food. And then it’s actually my father, like he started a store in Hayward selling like 30 plus different nationalities worth of food and then grew it into Palo Alto. And then like his business partner did a lot of the import that type of food. So I grew up like with. German, Russian, Jewish, everything under the sun. You know, it was just so, so crazy, but also amazing. Cause I got to experience and taste so many different kinds of things. I would never have gotten to do just being like, you know, a first generation kid, you know? Adam Fishman: Very cool. Now you have a family now. You wouldn’t be on the startup dad podcast unless you did. So you have a partner and you have one kid. How did you and your partner meet each other? And tell me a little bit about your son. David Haddad: We met on a dating app. I mean, that was it. We met on a dating app. She bought some beans on this app called coffee meets bagel. That was it. And it’s today is actually the day that we’re recording. This is the day we actually met. So, uh, yeah, yeah, it’s so we’re going to go out tonight and celebrate a little bit for our meet a versary. She’s great. She’s a behavioral therapist. Like she’s really smart, loving, great mom. great wife, great partner. Yeah. And a friend. So she’s everything. We have one son together, a pandemic baby. He’s almost three. It’s been a wild ride. Something I’ve always wanted to have, you know, a family and it’s, you know, hopefully it grows, but yeah, we’re just excited about our little family. It’s great. Adam Fishman: Yeah. When you were courting your partner after coffee meets bagel. Did you cook her any epic, magnificent meals that like won her over to your favor? David Haddad: Yeah, I cooked a lot of meals for her. I let that cat out of the box really quickly. I think it’s something I should have like maybe held back a bit more on, but yeah, no, I did. I think one of the meals she was pretty impressed with was like, I just did like a really nice like steak and potatoes with like some like Parmesan cheese on the potatoes and I just oven roasted it. It was Really good. I’ve made a bunch of other meals that she was just like, wow, he knows what he’s doing in the kitchen. I think it, it definitely gave me a leg up in many ways. Adam Fishman: Also set the tone for the expectations of the cooking for the relationship. But yeah, and that created, David Haddad: it created tension. I will say, I mean, that created a lot of tension between like, she knows how to cook. I think she’s a great cook. She’s more of like, even if she follows a recipe, she has really good, like, flavor. She has good flavor sensibilities and knows how to like, say, Oh, this could be, you know, I like this or like that. And when she follows a recipe, she makes something, it’s great. But I think there was always this like, s And so it’s not just me that has experienced this, but I’ve had friends on the opposite end of this where the, like the relationship dynamics starts like changing because one person’s good at cooking and one person’s not, they perceive themselves not to be. So there’s a sense of like insecurity and like there is, we had to get through that. There was definitely issues with it. So I didn’t realize I was casting as big of a shadow as I, Adam Fishman: as I did, but On the next top chef. Yeah. Next top chef. David Haddad: Right. Yeah. Exactly. Adam Fishman: What was the decision like for the two of you to start a family? David Haddad: I mean, we both wanted, I mean, that was part of like original conversations. Like we hit it out the gate pretty much saying like, yeah, we both wanted kids. We both wanted to have a family. I was like in the midst of like a firestorm with my company. So we kind of had to delay a bit of that. And so I needed to like, Work on that a bit before I exited my company, but it was just, it was like something we both wanted. So we cut to the chase on that. I think we didn’t even wait to figure that out. Like it was pretty, pretty clear. She’s always wanted to have one. I wanted to have one. So. Yeah, it was pretty straightforward. Cool. Adam Fishman: So, the first topic that I wanted to talk to you about today is around partnership dynamics. And you mentioned even, you know, you casting a big shadow in the kitchen. But some of the things that you brought up in our prep for the show are around mental load, shores. And then something you described as weaponized incompetence, which is a phrase, like when I was reading through that, I had to stop for a second. And I’m like, what did he mean there? So tell me about this universe of partnership dynamics. And then I’m really curious about weaponized incompetence. What David Haddad: does that mean? So I don’t have like a formal definition, but I could do an impression of what weaponized incompetence. We love a good impression here. Okay. Good impression is partner says. Specifically, the wife will say, honey, can you clean the bathroom? And so the husband says, babe, I don’t know. Do I use this brush or do I use this brush? Like, I’m just, I don’t get it. Like, or guys will do something like that. Like it’s very common, but it’s this like incompetence that’s used to like. Basically not do something so like this is actually the thing that got me really interested in doing this whole mr. Branzino thing it was really around this relationship dynamics And so I’ve heard that like I’ve heard of a lot of guys doing this like I have family members Let’s say that basically did that Type of weaponizing competence, like not change diapers though. Like they’ll mess it up on purpose in order to like, basically to not like have to deal with that type of chore. And so, because they know that like the sensibility of, let’s say like a mom is going to be like, Oh, I want to take care of my kid. I’m going to be the one that does it. Like, just let me do it. We hear from female friends, Oh, my husband doesn’t do anything. Or he’s just not pulling his weight. I was like, Oh, that sucks. And, you know, you start digging deeper, and there’s this whole thing around mental load, which I didn’t know anything about this. But it turns out a lot of women wake up in the morning, And especially it’s usually the mom and she’ll wake up in the morning and just kind of scan and she’s like scanning and she’s like, we got to do this. We got to do that. We got to do like, they’re just constantly thinking about like what the day is going to look like for the household for the kit and the load is weighed on her and then it turns into like. She doesn’t want to explain everything to her partner. And then it’d be like, Hey, could you help with this? Or could you do, and then she ends up just doing it because of maybe the man did some weaponizing competence or she finds it to be easier to do it her way. I read, and I can’t find where this tweet was that I saw it on Twitter X. There was a divorce lawyer that said that like over 60 something percent of like women that divorce their husband, when they file for divorce, it’s out of resentment. And it’s usually she’s tired. It’s like, say they have two kids together. She’s tired of raising a third child. So this is like mounts, right? This like mounts and mounts and mounts. Like if you just keep like not helping, you keep not doing anything. There’s a lot of stress in the relationship. And so there’s this really weird thing. It’s like, okay, there’s basic like life skills that you just should know. One of which is knowing how to make money. Let’s say another one is like maybe how to clean or do your. Laundry or something like that. Everyone’s cooking. And you know, like I know how to cook and I know what it does for my family. And it’s this thing of, this is like one of the, like, to me is like one of the most high leverage skills that you could ever have, because if you think about what that would do to your relationship. Like, if you just made a meal once a week as a dad or as a partner in your relationship, you’re going to reduce that mental load on your relationship. Yeah. The dynamics are very, very tough. And the crazy thing is like, you hear weird, like little things from our friends and whatever. And then you start, I like my wife would show me and I’ve had colleagues of mine show me like the mommy groups on Facebook. It’s the same thing. It’s like my husband doesn’t do anything. I just wish he would just cook an effing meal. Or I wish he would just. Make the lunches or I wish you would just do something because it’s so stressful. And these guys are then wondering, like, well, why am I getting divorced? Why is this relationship so strained? And it’s like, OK, cooking seems complicated, but if you do this, it’s going to pay massive dividends on your relationship and like the future of your family. I’m hoping to change that. Dynamic, but that’s the bit of the Genesis is based in a lot of like relationship dynamics. And I think it’s one aspect of like, you know, what I’m, I’m hoping to shift. Adam Fishman: I think there’s been a lot written about mental and emotional load. And so we’ll link to some relevant articles in the show notes, but I also think that it’s only relatively recently. That’s some. Dads have started to pay attention to this. I think, you know, moms have been paying attention to it forever, but they haven’t really had a term to describe it until, I don’t know, maybe the last decade or so. But yeah, we’ll link to some things. And I do love that description of weaponized incompetence. I know a lot of people who are like that, where they’re like, well, I’m just going to ask enough questions here. And then it’s almost like I’m not even doing the job anymore. I’m like the, you know, the marionette. Puppet and they’re just kind of pulling the David Haddad: strings and then that’s work too. It just leads to a lot of stress. And I think that we’re in a very busy time right now that things have just changed, you know, we’ve gone from, you know, patriarchy, it’s really funny. It’s this like funny thing with like cooking and it’s, you know, my grandmother would say like when I was starting to like learn how to cook and all that kind of stuff, like my grandmother would be like, why do you want to learn how to cook? You’re a man sort of thing. Like there’s this sort of like, well, there’s the patriarchy and the men goes and works and, you know, disciplines the children if they, they need it sort of thing. Right. But we’re now from patriarchy to partnership. And it’s like, I think that there’s something lost in that, like as a partner, you have to like chip in. We don’t have the luxury in society between our busy schedules or just economically that you can’t just be like, Oh, I’m the man. And I’m not going to do the most fundamental thing, which is like, which we do 90 percent you know, Most of the day is like, you know, outside of your sleeping and work is probably eating. So it’s like, you’re not going to like help with that is like such a funny, funny dynamic. But anyway, I’m getting a little, maybe a little off track, but probably relevant to the pod, but Adam Fishman: that’s okay. These are all good conversation topics. I wanted to ask you what is one of the more surprising things that you’ve discovered as a dad since your son was born that we set the tone. What do you mean by that? David Haddad: Well, like I didn’t realize that like, If you are good, your kid’s good. If you’re content and you’re like calm, your kid’s calm. It’s just like, sort of like you’re projecting this energy and they feel the energy. So you set the tone in terms of like, they’re watching us for behavioral cues. And I think anytime that I’ve gotten like frustrated or like he acts out. Every time I’ve been like chill, okay, there’s obviously exceptions where there’s nothing I could do. Like, even if I’m like cool as a cucumber about something, it doesn’t work. And I’ve seen this even with my nieces and even my interaction with them, like in watching my brother, like when, you know, he’s chill, like they’re chill. I’ve been seeing this modeled with other parents. I didn’t realize that they were watching that closely. That was been the most surprising thing is we are really in control of this. We are the adults in this relationship. At least right now. And so, you know, we’re sort of the ones responsible for setting the tone. Adam Fishman: Yeah, no, that makes it, that makes a ton of sense. And it’s something that a lot of dads have talked about on this show is this modeling, this behavior. It’s also something that doesn’t come easy to everybody. Right. What do you do if you find yourself. You know, not modeling or feeling like you’re about to kind of go in a direction that you’re not going to be happy about. Like, do you do anything to kind of reset yourself or excuse yourself from the situation? Or what’s sort of a best practice that you’ve found works for you? David Haddad: For me, it’s just like walking away. It’s just walking away for like a minute and then just taking a deep breath and then trying to just realize that like, like he’s not doing anything to me. You know, like he doesn’t have power over me, right? Like, I think that’s the main thing. And when I just tell myself, he doesn’t have power over me, I’m in control here. Let me just kind of reset and then I’ll like come back to him. And then it usually works. Cause I think he knows that I’m upset and he can kind of sense, he kind of changes his tone as well. So that usually that tends to work. Also, I learned this, a lot of this from my wife. So this is like, not like, uh, not natural instinct. I’ve had to really like, I’m still working on it, but yeah, yeah. Adam Fishman: Yeah, a lifelong journey, I think. I mean, I don’t think anybody that pretends that they’re perfect a hundred percent of the time is being honest. No, it’s human, human nature. So awesome. We’re going to talk about kids and food in a second, but the one thing I wanted to ask you before that is if you could rewind the clock, you know, three years to a younger David pre child David, and you’ve got an extended family and friends and stuff, you’re getting bombarded with parenting advice. People who are like, Oh, you’re going to have a kid. You got to do this. You got to do that. What piece of advice that you got, would you tell yourself to completely ignore? Like, what did you find to just be untrue when you became a dad that maybe somebody was emphatic about? This worked for me, so it’s going to work for you. It wasn’t David Haddad: really advice. And I hate saying this because this is, seems like this is a very American thing. Cause I don’t hear this from my friends from other parts of the world is they complain a lot about children and I let their complaints about like, Oh, it’s so hard. It’s so hard. You’re never going to sleep. It’s so difficult. Like they’re just constantly like nagging you. Like. Good luck. Like, good luck trying to get sleep wasn’t hard. I mean, I think it was like a mental frame and I just, but I let some of that get into my head and it really stressed me out because I was like, how am I going to sleep? How am I going to do work? How am I going to do this? How am I going to do that? And you’re just like thinking about all that stuff again. I think it’s just Americans love complaining. I think it’s like, you know, it’s just like a natural, like, yeah. You know, right of passage, being an American is to complain about everything, but other parts of the world, they don’t do that. In my experience, they don’t complain about having children. It’s just like, it is what it is. It we’re having a child and that’s what it is. And we will handle it as it will come. It’s, you know, as natural as, you know, drinking water. It’s a big deal, but it’s not that big of a deal. I think people here, and also going back to the relationship dynamics, I think people here. Have very broken families. I think people because of economic opportunities, they’re left alone in a lot of ways. They’re like, they’re away from their families. They’re away from their community and their network. And it’s hard. It’s just really hard being a parent. And so you’re like, unfortunately, like hearing all this negativity and you’re seeing like a lot of people talking about this idyllic sort of like lifestyle on Instagram or just the socials and like what being a parent is supposed to be. And it’s like, none of that, it’s none of those extremes, you know? So I think that there’s a lot that adds to the stress of like, when it comes to, you know, figuring out how do you maintain your household and do the chores and stuff is because there’s like no one helping you. So that was the biggest thing. I think I was just like, would completely disregard anyone telling me that it’s hard. It is hard, but it’s also, Amazing. I know when you don’t hear a lot of people talking about how great it is and all the other stuff, most of it is very negative. Adam Fishman: That’s really interesting. Push away the negative, even though it’s hard that you psyching yourself out. If you like absorb too much of that stuff, David Haddad: the best advice I got, I had two pieces of advice, one from a friend’s father who said, everything’s temporary. The good’s temporary and the bad’s temporary. That like kept us through like, everything was just like, Everything’s temporary. The second one was from, what was it? What was the show Ted lasso. And it was when Roy, did you, I don’t know if you watched that show at all, but I did when Roy, Roy was like talking to, I think he was talking to Ted about his kid. I don’t remember what the context, but Roy said something like all these kids want to do is just be part of your life. Hmm. And it, and it was just like, they just wanna do things with you and it’s like, that’s it. And it was like, oh, okay. That was another thing. Like it didn’t need to be so like, the kids do this and I do that. It’s like, no, we do that stuff together. That always rubs really like helpful. And then, and then Neil Degrass Tyson had something around, like, they’re just little scientists. They’re just trying to understand patterns and you know, if they’re gonna jump in a puddle, it’s because they wanna like. Experience what that’s like to jump in a puddle. So it’s just like, don’t get mad every single time that they like try to do something. They’re just little scientists trying to figure stuff out their world out. Adam Fishman: That’s a really nice way of thinking about it’s a very positive spin on that. I often use the Jurassic park reference. They’re like Raptors testing the fences, but, um, that seems a little bit more negative probably. Yeah. They’re jumping in a puddle. They’re just trying to see what happens. David Haddad: Yeah. They’re dropping an egg cause they, they’re understanding gravity, you know, like they’re, they’re understanding their world. They don’t know anything. Right. So I think it’s too easy to just get frustrated and angry about like them trying to do stuff. But I think just, you know, taking a step back and it’s like, it’s our, again, it’s our job to model and to teach and all that kind of stuff. So, well, speaking of Adam Fishman: dropping an egg. Let’s talk about kids and food. Look at that segue. Oh, no, you’re going to get a lot of hate David Haddad: mail for this. Adam Fishman: I know. So one thing I wanted to, I just want to acknowledge one thing, which for both of us, we are both Products of a Western civilization. We are both fairly privileged folks. And I just want to acknowledge that like feeding your kids, creative and diverse meals and taking any amount of time to make food is a privilege that not everyone has. Right? Like some people are very rushed. They can’t, they literally can’t do what they have to do. Whatever they can now, all that being said, I imagine that if you have the privilege of listening to this podcast, you are probably in a similar camp to you to you and to me. And so I’m going to set the. Privileged part of this conversation appreciate that for a second and assume that most of the people who are listening to this podcast are probably struggling a bit with getting their kids to eat good stuff, right? Even the best of us can default to chicken nuggets and plain pasta with butter on it, right? So. Tell me about your approach to food with your son, and what do you do in your household? David Haddad: Yeah, this is funny. I actually posted about some of the rules. I said these were my rules, not the rules. But these were just, again, I’m going to also caveat these are my rules in the household. And I call them rules, but they’re obviously flexible, and we don’t Follow them all the time. Cause it’s just, and I didn’t come up largely with these. I got a lot of help from a website called solid starts. There’s obviously like a book that we really like. The name is escaping me at the moment, but I will remember it in a minute. But the author’s name is, he’s a doctor named Brazelton. Anyway, we’ll find it. Yeah. So what I’ve noticed, what is going on as I think what ends up happening is that parents, this is going back to like modeling the behavior. I think that a lot of times parents are. And again, I don’t mean to say, I’m not trying to cast aspersions, but I find a lot of times when it comes to the dinner table, the parents are afraid of their children. And I feel like they’re afraid that like, Oh, well, little Jimmy doesn’t like what I’m making and he’s going to cry. So I’d rather just have him stop crying and I’m going to just give him what he wants. Like, I’ll just give him chicken nuggets and pasta. So I’ve seen this with a lot of friends that they will be like short order cooks. And so they’re just like making separate meals for their child. And it’s just like the most, the craziest thing in the world. I never grew up, I don’t know if you did, but I never grew up with like, my mom would make food and we’d say, what’s for dinner? And she’s like, get up here and see what I’m making. I’m not telling you, I’m not like a waiter. Giving you like a restaurant menu of like what you get your options to eat. We’re eating food. This is dinner. We’re eating together. So I wrote a post about this, about my rules and some of these things. And I got like a lot. I got some hate. People called me Hitler. People called me Stalin. People said, good luck. You know, in the nursing home, when your kids don’t come to see you, you’re too strict with your children. And then I got a lot of support from dads too. And so I think that I struck a nerve with this thing, but what I do, it’s not Difficult. It’s just like, it’s like a little bit of my responsibility is to like make a meal. We sit down together at the table every day. I wrote about this as well as like Barack Obama, you know, whenever he wasn’t traveling, he was at the dinner table every night with his family. Like you and I are not as busy as Barack Obama. We are not solving world conflict and world problems. So what excuse do we have? To not like have dinner with our family. I think a lot of families when I, what I saw in the exchange over on the internet and people on, I mean, this is like Reddit too, where people are pretty, you know, pretty mean, but I think what I saw is like a lot of talking about only good things. Only nice people are on Reddit. There’s such a kind community. Uh, I love Reddit, but you know, like a lot of families eat separately. They eat in different rooms. They don’t eat together or they eat at different times. Like, I know a lot of friends they’ll be like, well, my kids eat at like five, five 30, but like, we’re not hungry at five, five 30. So we’ll eat at like seven or eight o’clock because that’s when we want to eat. But like, you’re not eating with your kids. You’re not modeling the behavior. And it means there’s a sacrifice there. Like, yeah, you might need to start eating between five and six o’clock. That’s like, you know, grandpa hour. You know, that’s the blue plate special hour, but you know, you’re going to just have to adjust with that in order to model the behaviors. So I think for, for us, we eat together. There’s no devices. We try to have some conversation around the food. We try to have as much uplifting conversations. We’ve talked to my son about his day. We talk about our days. He hears what we’re up to. You know, he doesn’t get another option. He gets what he gets. You know, he doesn’t, Get to have like other kinds of foods he gets as many, you know, vegetables and meat and protein or whatever he wants But if he’s like I want like a ton more carbs like we don’t like I mean if we’re traveling or something Obviously, it’s not like these are not hard fast I’m not like a dictator about this But it’s just like he gets what we eat and I think that’s the main thing and if he doesn’t eat it That’s okay. I’m not going to give him anything else to eat. And so he will be fine. He will be hungry. And the next day he will eat. He’ll be very hungry the next day and he will eat. These are my rules. These are. Quote unquote rules, but it’s just sort of like coming back to the basics. Like this didn’t exist 30 years ago where kids like got to eat whatever they wanted and eat in the room. I think in my age and the eighties, early nineties, kids did eat in their room and they like play video games and stuff in their room. But I think it’s gotten to a point now where like kids are on their phones and kids are just like watching TV or they’re like doing, I mean, it’s just gotten kind of out of control. I think once that starts getting established, like your job isn’t to like make them eat. All the food. It’s just to like present it and be together and just build the habit and the repetition in terms of like doing that together. So it’s, you know, again, I’m not an expert in this. Like, I’m not like a child expert in like how to do this. You know, we have challenging days, no doubt. Like there are days where he doesn’t want to, he throws the food, he doesn’t want to eat it. And like, like, that’s okay. Like he’s gonna, I’m not gonna, I’m not, yeah. backing down to whatever he wants just because he wants pasta. Like I made a very good soup. It has all the nutrients that he needs in there and he doesn’t want it. He can, you know, tough luck. He’ll be hungry tomorrow and he’ll Adam Fishman: eat a great breakfast. That’s David Haddad: right. It always happens. Yeah. Adam Fishman: Yeah. What is something that you make that your son Absolutely loves. What’s a dad meal? What’s a Mr. Branzino meal that your son looks forward to? David Haddad: He loves, he loves meatballs. I made a chicken soup yesterday. He loved, he does like when I do make pasta type dishes. I mean, that’s just fun for him. I made empanadas over the weekend. He loved that. Like he loves chimichurri. He loves grilled, you know, whenever I barbecue, I’ve noticed anytime that I involve him in the food and the making of the food, he eats it. He eats. most of the food. Yeah. He usually likes most of what it is that I make. I’d say like 70, 80 percent of what I make. He, he eats pretty, pretty well. Adam Fishman: A lot of people would be intimidated about letting their kid who’s not even three. Help them in the kitchen or help. I put help in air quotes so much that a, that a young kid can do, but you talked about including him in the making of the food. So what are some things that you’ve found? And again, it could be unique to your situation, but what are some things that your son helps you with? And again, remember to the folks who are listening, he’s not even three. David Haddad: So various things like we got from Target, one of those stand things that go against the counter. Uh, they go up to the countertop, they’re like eye level with the countertop. Well, he’s not at eye level, but anyway, he’s at the countertop. Whisking, I’ll let him like crack an egg ’cause it’s fun for him. I let him, like when we hard boiled eggs, like he peels it, he likes peeling it and crushing the egg. I let him peel garlic. I let him smash the garlic in a little mortar and pestle. I mean, don’t tell my wife this, but I let him like help. He flipped the steak on the grill the other day, which is like kind of too close to the fire. But I’m sure Adam Fishman: your wife will never listen to this episode. So it’s just safe between the two of us David Haddad: and maybe the world. But anyway, so what else, as long as it’s not going to involve him, like cutting his finger, like burning himself. Like I just let him try to do some, like we made empanadas. I gave him a little scooper, like an ice cream scooper. And he had like fun, like scooping out the mix and throwing it into the empanada. Pastry dough. I let him take a fork to do some crimping. So little things. He’s not like fully cooking. Like it’s just like little, little, little tasks that like make him feel like pretty included. I give him some gloves. He likes the gloves. That’s basically it. I mean, this is stuff that like my grandma would let me do. You know, we would go to the farmer’s market and go get fava beans. And you know, my grandma would be like, all right, you’re picking the the fava beans or, you know, We would get these leaves that we would use to make kind of a stew, like kind of a spinach y style stew, and they’re like these big Big leave things. And so we would like just sit there with my grandma and my mom, just like picking, picking, picking, picking. And it’s just like stuff that the kids do. We used to mortar and pestle and yeah, yeah, just easy stuff. Adam Fishman: That’s good. As long as it’s safe, they can do it. You know, they may not do it. As well as you would, but no, David Haddad: and it takes longer, it does take longer, which is a little, it can be frustrating when you’re in a pinch of time, but it’s beautiful. I think it’s a beautiful thing. I read a quote from technon hot Han, the Buddhist kind of philosopher guy, and he said that nothing comes from nothing. And I think it’s important for them to understand that. The food that we’re making comes from the earth. It comes from people who put it together. Like they package something or they like cut it from the earth and like, they’re preparing it. And, you know, I think associating yourself with the food is important to, you know, we, we build products too. Right. We got to give like free samples and we got to give them some sort of like teaser to make them want to come in. And so if you’re just like, people want to feel more involved in the products so they can have, you know, have retention with the product. You know, in the end. Adam Fishman: I love that. David Haddad: Yeah. Adam Fishman: So I wanted to transition to our last topic, which is you’ve made it part of your mission to teach dads how to cook, get dads more comfortable in the kitchen, right? Which is like a very positive step in the right direction. And so I wanted to start and just ask you. Why do you think, and in the conversations that you have with people about cooking, what do you hear from people when they say, like, why they’re not comfortable in the kitchen? What makes dads, and that’s, again, the audience for the show, what makes dads so uncomfortable in the kitchen? What are we worried about? David Haddad: It’s this really weird thing. It’s like, guys are very We have big egos. We have, a lot of us have very big egos, especially in probably the audiences listening to this have like, you know, we’re successful in certain ways, like professionally, and we get into the nitty gritty with numbers. We’re able to dissect certain things. And so there’s a sort of like, we have an ego around that, but when it comes to this thing that is like so primal, which is like, to cook. It’s like, I just don’t know how to do it. There’s this weird sort of like anxiety. There’s guys on some ends of the scale that are like, they feel weird because of the gender dynamic, even though that we’re living in some, you know, partnership times and modern times, they still feel like, Oh, this is what women still do. You also have on the other end, like a lot of guys are like, well, this is what my mom did. Like, yeah, that’s again, going back to the gender thing. And so, A lot of guys, they feel like they can read a recipe, but they get very nervous because they don’t know every single thing about like everything because of maybe like their analytical brains, especially in the, you know, in the tech world, like guys are very smart and they want to know everything about everything and they intellectualize everything. And so because they don’t know what something is, they lack curiosity and they kind of get freaked out and they just Default to like ordering out or something, or they burn the food or they do other things. So there’s just, I don’t know, there’s a lot of weird, invisible kind of scripts that they tell themselves. Like, I’m not good at this. It’s like anything. It’s like people who don’t know much about exercise. They start, you know, Well, I don’t know. I don’t want to hurt myself. So, you know, like that’s another one. Like they fear they’re going to hurt themselves or cut their finger. There’s just like all sorts of these stories that I’m like, cause I’ve been like helping a lot of guys along this journey. And it’s just, yeah, it’s interesting where they start in terms of like the stories they tell themselves about it. They’re just very overwhelmed. They feel very overwhelmed by like how much stuff has to go into a meal. They feel overwhelmed by like, The complexity, quote unquote, complexity of cooking. So there’s just a lot of Adam Fishman: feelings. So when you’re working with a new dad and trying to teach them how to cook, describe your system to me. You know, one of the things I read on your site and in our conversation was about taking about two hours and being able to prep an entire week’s worth of food, which feels like one of those things that’s like, And over promise, right? In just two hours, you’ll make a week’s worth of food. But I actually saw some of the pictures of stuff that you made. David Haddad: Yeah. Adam Fishman: And I think, you know, there was like a creativity involved where you’re like, Oh, if I do this, then I can reuse this here. And I could reuse this year and I make this and like, you know, et cetera. And then suddenly it was like the permutations of. Interesting recipes came out of, you know, what was around two hours of investment. So I guess all this is to say, like, let’s go back to my original question, which is tell me about your system. The David Haddad: system is look, it’s a little bit, the cooking is around two hours and it’s not two hours at one time. I think that’s part of it. So obviously you have to do a little bit of planning and you also have to do a little, you have to obviously do the shopping, but you don’t have to go do that. You can also do Instacart and sure. Amazon fresh or whatever. I enjoy the shopping, but. It’s four parts. It’s planning programming. So that’s the P I call it Pisces. So Branzino fish, Pisces Adam Fishman: together to me. Yeah. Yeah. David Haddad: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, the Mr. Branzino brand comes from like Branzino is this like fish that my wife and I would always eat when we were dating. It’s our love fish. So this is, you know, it was like the birthing of our son is like, Adam Fishman: yeah, it’s all, it’s also the name. If you’ve ever seen the movie, Luca, the kids movie. He lives underwater, and Mr. and Mrs. Branzino are a neighbor of his. Oh, no way. I think they’re fish, or they’re like some sea creature, but they’re named Mr. and Mrs. Branzino. David Haddad: I’m gonna get taken down by Disney or something now. Okay, here we go. Never. So, so it’s. Planning and programming. And I think this is like the essence of how you’re able to get a lot of stuff done is around the programming. That’s the hardest part. The planning, once you kind of get used to it and I can go into like how we do it, how I do it is pretty straightforward. And then it’s the shopping, cooking, and then eating. So the planning, you have to spend like maybe 15 minutes doing it. And you’re kind of just like looking for, is there a, maybe you went out to a restaurant and you were like, Oh, I really liked that like meal or that dish. Or like, we went to like, had Thai food or Mexican food. And then you just want to play around with that type of thing. ethnic theme, or you’re like, Oh, I want to try like more Italian this week or more Mexican this week or something like that. Or maybe there’s like a holiday coming up, or maybe you have a diet that you’re trying to do because you’re trying to lose weight or gain weight or do, you know, whatever. I try to make a lot of the planning based around protein, just because that usually is the star of our show in our house that might not be in other people’s homes, but in our home, we try to balance between protein, carbs and vegetables. And then it’s just about like, Programming that out. And so the programming comes to like where you’re doing like about an hour and a half ish of cooking on a Sunday. So you’re planning on a Friday. You’re shopping on Saturday. And this is very simplistic. This is obviously you can adapt this to your own needs, but you’re planning on a Friday. You’re shopping on Saturday. You’re doing like one batch of meals that you’re doing on Sunday. And this is like not novel, right? Like it’s just, that’s how I do it, but I’m able to do it very quickly. And then the key here is to take the main protein that you do on that Sunday and remix it. So the remix comes in on Monday, Tuesday. So I’ll do like, depending on the weather, it’s either like more coldish weather is more like soupy and then more like, You know, warmer weather will be more salady and then Tuesdays are more tacos. So it’s more like wraps and sandwiches and things like that on Tuesdays. Wednesdays will be more like a one pot. I like the thematic size and that’s not a word, but like to make every day into like a theme. So there’s just like easier to like systemize the work. And so when you’re cooking throughout the week, you’re like. 10 minutes, five minutes. You’re just taking the main thing and remixing it in a way. That’s like pretty easy. It’s just changing the form factor. I just wanted to caveat that’s only for family dinner. That’s only for dinner food. If you’re trying to do like lunches and breakfast, that will increase your time because you have to also consider that. But I think family dinner is the thing that we’re trying to like focus on for dads is just doing that. And then I do also recommend, you know, like people going out to dinner if you can’t afford it. Even if you’re like, Oh, I want to go to like Chick fil a or I’m going to go to, I’ve never been there, but if I hear it’s good, but like, if you go to those types of like fast food places or in and out, or that’s okay, like you deserve a break. And it’s not like every night has to be like this gourmet thing. I think you should budget for that and enjoy, and it helps you like expand your palate, expand your horizon of what’s possible. You start getting new ideas. You start like, you know, exploring your city and your locale. Like, I think it’s a cool, it’s a great way to like, Break it up so you’re not always cooking. Cause it gets boring. And I’m sure you feel this way. It gets sometimes pretty boring, like cooking the same similar things over and over again. Adam Fishman: So walk me through. So Pisces is the, is the acronym and that’s planning, programming. And then what I miss shopping, David Haddad: cooking, eating. Yeah. So the shopping in general, we’re very blessed to be in California. We have like a lot of great farmer’s markets and whatnot, but you know, we do like usually like a Saturday or a Sunday farmer’s market day in California. It’s also an outing for the kid. And this is when I went back to the Roy from Ted Lasso, which is that like, they just want to be part of your life. Like, I think that the shopping is like a great experience. It’s also like, you know, they get to see where the food comes from. So we always do farmer’s market. Like once a week, we get our fruits, we get our veggies based upon what I had come up with at the meal plan. I shop like a grandma. Which is, Adam Fishman: what does that mean? David Haddad: This is like, if you talk to any grandma, like from old world or just, you know, I’m at a point now where I don’t like plan super hard because I let the market kind of tell me what I should be making. So if you see like a, you know, Oh wow, there’s a pot roast is on sale for one 99 a pound. You’re going to make pot roast like, or chickens on sale. Like you’re going to make chicken. Right. So you kind of like change your menu based upon what you get from the market. I shop for things that are like. You know, inexpensive, usually great value and then things that look beautiful and tasty. We alternate every week with like Costco and Whole Foods. So we go back and forth between the two. Costco is like the number one thing you can do as a family is just having a Costco membership. It’s the best, whatever, a hundred bucks a year. You’re going to spend for Adam Fishman: all your food needs. Or if you also need to buy a trampoline, uh, or, or David Haddad: a refrigerator, uh, Her refrigerator. Yeah, exactly. So we just alternate off that. And it’s just like we take our son with us and quick tip. If you go to like Whole Foods or Trader Joe’s, they give you a little stickers at Costco. They’ll give you, they draw a little like happy face for your kids. And if you have young kids, it’s like a great, they love it. So there’s shopping and look, you can make delicious meals, even buying food from Walmart, like Walmart and target. They have all the same things that those places have. You can, might be spending, you know, a little bit more money here and there, but it’s like, You know, Costco is just a better value if you have the space and then the cooking is the Adam Fishman: next part. One of the things I’d love to talk about within cooking is give me like a week, maybe what you, what did you cook, you know, a week ago or like what, you know, what is a typical meal plan and cook look like for a family? Cause I want to put it into concrete example. Cause you mentioned like Cooking and then remixing. David Haddad: Yeah. Adam Fishman: And I’m really curious to hear more about what that means and kind of unpack that a little bit more. So you could take us through like a standard week in the Mr. Branzino plan. David Haddad: Yeah, a hundred percent. So let’s say last week I made some, I call it like my everyday chicken and I just use chicken thighs. Probably not as healthy as chicken breasts, but ties are just hands down better. I’ll fight anyone. It tastes better. Yeah. They taste way better. Adam Fishman: I’ll fight anyone on that. I’ll fight David Haddad: anyone on that. Yeah. So I made some chicken, some chicken thighs, and it’s really just being able to portion that out. So like we’re three, I do about like a third of a pound per person. So I’ll make enough to last a tooth the evening and you don’t have to do just one. You know, one protein, you could do two, whatever, but I’ll make sure that during the week, we’ll have two different kinds of protein, but I might just do one for up to Tuesday night. And then it’s like two vegetables, one carb could be like rice or potatoes or whatever it is. And then a sauce of sorts, like maybe a dressing, depending on if we’re eating more salads or something. And if like, I have a lot more time, I’ll do like a soup too. And so, you know, Last Sunday I made like chicken. I made enough carb. Like I made some actually rice and like a za’atar potatoes. I made cauliflower and broccoli. I made a yogurt cucumber sauce. I made hummus and that was it. That was Sunday dinner. Monday, you know, I had some tomatoes. I had some. Cucumbers. And I made a Greek salad with some feta and olives and stuff. And I added the chicken and I added the potatoes to it. So it was like a complete meal. It was great. Tuesday I made wraps. So I just had some pita bread and I like wrapped it up and I just took everything. And we finished everything. It was gone by Tuesday. So it was done. Wednesday was a one pot meal. So I kind of did Mexican ish. Like I had some cans of bean and corn and stuff and made it with like some ground Yeah, I just did a one pot like kind of rice dish. It was like, yeah, it tasted like enchiladas, but it was like rice and meat and it was very, it was really good. And then we read that again on Thursday, added a salad to it. So I had made like a little just simple, like lemon juice, olive oil dressing with the same meal. So we use leftovers. It’s not like, I think this is another thing I’ve noticed. Families don’t eat a lot of leftovers, but like. That’s the only way to scale is like, you can eat different things every day, but it’s very difficult to do with the time constraints and everyone’s so busy. And then Friday we went out to dinner and then Saturday we went to someone’s house for dinner. So it was a little bit easy. And then Sunday we did it again. Started Adam Fishman: it all over again. So it sounds like in this typical week, you know, you’re kind of optimizing for Sunday through Thursday, which gets you through the majority of the week. Yeah. Low stress. Remixing every night and then kind of hitting the reset button midweek. And then a couple other alternative plans Friday, Saturday, which for busy parents usually happens, right? There’s usually something going on and then hit starting all David Haddad: over again on Sunday. Adam Fishman: It’s David Haddad: not rocket science, but in practice, it’s actually really, really easy. It takes really no time. And it’s a very like once you get it down and you’re like just having that programming in place, it allows you to like not think. Okay. And you’re kind of just like go in the kitchen, have that framework of like, okay, today’s like salad night. I’m just going to put protein and some little bit of carb and I’m going to make like a salad bowl. So you get your greens in and all that stuff. Adam Fishman: Love that. David Haddad: I Adam Fishman: love thinking about, I’ve seen a couple of other people talk about sort of thematic evenings, which is what you’re describing here, which is like. Sunday is the official portioned out dinner. Monday is, you know, salad day. Tuesday is soup day. Wednesday is one pot meal day. Like it’s really interesting to think about that because then you’re like, well, that now I know how much I need to make. I know I’m going to incorporate like a diversity of vegetables and carbs and protein and everything. So I wanted to ask you if you’re a dad, that’s just starting out. You know, when you’re not very inventive in the kitchen, so I imagine you could look at a set of stuff and go, Oh, I can whip something up with this, right? Because you’ve been doing this a lot. You said you’ve been cooking for, you know, 20 plus years, but for the dads who aren’t all that creative in the kitchen who can’t just like look and have, you know, like a beautiful mindset of connections of ingredients and be like, Aha, I have a meal now for three days. Where should dads get inspiration around recipes around like, just like how to, you know, if you’re somebody who needs more of an instruction manual, which has a, that’s how I cook in the kitchen. I need guidance. I need a recipe unless it’s something I’d made a hundred times. And then I’m like, cool. I know generally how to do this. What do you recommend? David Haddad: I actually have a swipe file of like all the different places I get my inspiration from books, from YouTube, from blog websites, like cooking blogs, but I mean one hack I’ve used a lot, which is Blue Apron has blueapron. com slash cookbook and it’s not really well publicized, but it’s a great app. Little hack because you can find out all the Adam Fishman: apron, the meal kit company, the company that’s going to ship you pre portion things that you can throw into a pot. They also give away all their secrets. Apparently David Haddad: they gave away all their recipes for what they’re making because they, you know, if you don’t want to have the leaflet with you, you can have the recipe for what they’re going to be cooking. So I use that a lot because I care about trying to eat as seasonal as possible, seasonally as possible. So they have a good job of like, you know, saying, Oh, this is what we’re making that is seasonal or whatever it is. That’s one place. I love New York. cooking. newyorktimes. com. Like, I think if a dad was just starting out, I think you may not get into the system of doing this every single day just yet. I think just try make one meal once a week or once a month. I think given the dynamics that kind of exist in the world, the relationship dynamics, I think if you just did once every week. Week or months start with once a month and then go to once a week. Try to do it on a Sunday and make that your day to like make a meal. Just go to like cooking. newyorktimes. com and find a recipe that you dig. They have a good filters. You could do a sheet pan meal. You just do something. I think just get started. The trick with recipes is that they’re a framework. They’re a guide. They’re not the word of God. So like you can do what you want. Figure out what are the core essentials of the meal, get to the essence of the meal, read the recipe, go through, like, find out what the, I have a chemistry background, so this is like, I call it the rate limiting step, so it’s like, what is the step that’s going to prevent you from like, from the chemical reaction from happening, but in, in the cooking world, it’s like the things that are going to prevent you from, they’re going to slow you down, so it’s just like reading through the recipe one time, glance it over, but then be like, okay, it says, Preheat the oven. This is where people get freaked out. And this is what I’ve heard in a lot with a lot of guys is that they like, don’t read the recipe. And then they’re like, wait a minute, I’m supposed to turn this on. Like I’m supposed to boil the water and then they forget to boil the water. So just the, a lot of the big steps, like preheat the oven, boil the water, just get that stuff started first, because then it’s a lot easier to like get your flow with what you’re, so I would just say, start there, watch YouTube videos. If you like any of that, there’s a few People that I love, I love chef John from food wishes. He’s the best. He’s like, makes tons of dad jokes. He’s great. Oh, you know, we love a good dad joke around startup dad. There we go. Adam Fishman: Yeah, David Haddad: there’s a ton of them down there. And I have a swipe file Adam Fishman: I can share with folks too. Oh, maybe we could link to that in the show notes. That would be interesting. Well, I love that. And it sounds like underlying all of this is like. Just get started. Try and set the ego aside. Realize you might burn the potatoes, or the chicken, or something might not taste as great as you’d like it to. But just, try once. Then try a second time. And like, you know, I think back to the movie Mrs. Doubtfire, when he’s trying to get a girlfriend. He’s trying to cook and he like tries to do lobster and he sets himself on fire and that’s right and he ends up ordering food, but then like he starts watching videos and like over time, you know, with a little bit of practice, he gets better and better and better at it. And so it doesn’t involve ordering, you know, lobster out or anything like that. So, but yeah, it sounds like that’s the underlying advice. Like, just get started, use a system. You know, start with one time a month. Love that idea. One time a month. Think about how you might make leftovers, then you get, then that one time a month turns into a couple of meals. And then that one time a week turns into a couple of meals. And the next thing you know, you’re cooking like half the meals in the month just by, you know, cooking three or four times a month. So David Haddad: that’s 100 percent right. I wouldn’t overburden yourself with like Getting into the system right away. But I think it’s just like, start doing something. You’re going to mess up. You’re going to screw up. That’s okay. Just eat your failure and it’s going to be great. Adam Fishman: Tell me about a disastrous recipe that you made. What is something that just turned out inedible or terrible or whatever? Let’s we’re big on failure stories here on startup dad. So I’d love to hear about one of your like most epic cooking failure stories. David Haddad: Oh my God. When I was at Berkeley. There was a wine club. And there was a guy who made this like amazing thing. He did like green grapes with like onions. He sauteed the grapes with the onions. It was really nice. He put like herbs and then he had some like brie cheese that he put. And it was like, you just kind of take a, you know, thing of baguettes and you, you scoop it out. I was like, Oh, I’m going to make this for some friends. Oh my God. It was so bad. It was like I put the brie too early in the pan. It melted all over the pan. And then it was just like, it was so bad. And everyone was like saying like, dude, this is like, we’re just beat. Like, they like, Hmm. Yes. And they’re like, one guy. I mean, I would love him. He, you know, he’s like a brother to me. He’s like, bro, this. Sucks. This is really bad. I was like, okay, thank you. So I kind of tried to like freestyle something I’ve never made before in front of other people. So don’t freestyle with your friends if you’ve never made something. So that was a really bad meal that I made. Adam Fishman: Did you ever redeem yourself? Did you ever remake that recipe and do it better? David Haddad: To be honest, I’m still haunted. I’ve never remade it. I I’ve honestly never remade it. That’s okay. You know, Adam Fishman: you know, you, you maybe someday, maybe for your David Haddad: anniversary Adam Fishman: with your wife. David Haddad: That’s right. Maybe I will do that. That’s a funny, yeah. Why not? Let me, let me try that over. Adam Fishman: Overcome your fears. David Haddad: Yeah. Okay. Adam Fishman: Well, last question for you. How can people follow along or be helpful to you? You’re obviously trying to build this. Company, this brand. So what’s a good way for people to get involved? David Haddad: Yeah, just go to my sub stack. Mr. Benzino dot sub stack. com. Check out, just sign up for the newsletter. You can kind of follow along the journey there. I have like a course. It’s like, you know, become a meal machine in seven days. So you can kind of like. Follow along. I have more details, like the entire operating system, how to do it with instructions and recipes, and you can kind of get started. And then I also have a dad cook community. If people are interested called the dad cook crew. If you want to like be part of like a community of guys that are like trying to like change and make their lives, bring less stress to their relationships. And you know, yeah. Teach your kids to eat for life. You know, this is like, you know, what we’re building as well. But yeah, just sign up for the newsletter. Awesome. We will Adam Fishman: direct everyone there in the show notes. And David, thank you so much for being on and for talking about Mr. Branzino and teaching me something about how to cook. I love the Pisces system. I’m going to give that one a second thought for my household. So do you have a few minutes for our rapid fire round? Let’s do it. Yeah. Okay. What is the most indispensable parenting product that you have ever purchased? Nanit. The Nanit camera. Okay. What is the most useless parenting product that you have ever purchased? David Haddad: We got a warmer for some wipe thing and that was completely effing useless. Yeah. That did nothing. Yeah. Yeah. Adam Fishman: What is the most frustrating thing that has ever happened to you as a dad? David Haddad: Yeah, just like my son stopping dead, you know, dead stopping in the middle of the street when he like doesn’t want to do something and we’re trying to move. That’s super frustrating, but yeah, that’s been the biggest frustrating thing. I’m sure every dad’s dealt with that. Yeah, Adam Fishman: that is a new one or at least one that hasn’t been shared, but every dad’s dealt with that. Yeah. What is the most difficult kids TV show that you’ve ever had to sit through? David Haddad: Cocoa Melon. Adam Fishman: Oh, yeah. Yes. David Haddad: Horrible. Adam Fishman: Horrible David Haddad: TV. Adam Fishman: Horrible television. Have you ever used your son as an excuse to get out of a social event? All the time. David Haddad: I used it, used him, not even used him to like go use the bathroom at a private restaurant because I said he has to use the bathroom and you know, I had to use it. That was it. So, but yeah, no, it’s, I have used it. Yes. To get out of things. Adam Fishman: Yeah. Love that parenting hack. Blame your kid if you need to use the restroom at like a private place. That’s a good one. Exactly. Exactly. What is your favorite kids movie? Coco. Coco. Worst TV show? Coco Melon. Favorite movie? Coco. Those are polar opposites. That’s right. Yeah. Polar David Haddad: opposites. Not the same thing. Adam Fishman: Not the same thing. What is the worst experience you’ve ever had assembling a kid’s toy or a piece of furniture? David Haddad: I was trying to make my son his little like strider bike. thing this weekend and he kept taking the tools away and running away and going outside with the tools. So it just took way longer than it should have, but yeah, that was super frustrating, but also, you know, also super cute that he was trying to. Play with it, play around, but yeah. Adam Fishman: Alright, because you are big on cooking, how long can a piece of food sit on the floor in your house and you will still eat it? I’m still pretty tried and true with the 5 second rule. Like, I’ll still do the 5 second rule, yeah. 5 second rule it is. What nostalgic movie can you not wait to force your son to watch? Dumb and Dumber. Oh, that’s a good one. Yeah. Big gulp sound. Big gulp sound. Well, see you later. Uh, and finally, what is your take on minivans? David Haddad: I’m all about it. I’m all about him, especially if they’re like, you know, champagne. That’s a yeah. Why not? So yeah, you know, a baller drink, you know, so yeah, I don’t not champagne, but yeah, definitely am all about him. Wife is not, but I am. Yeah. Okay. Adam Fishman: We have some conflict here in the marriage. Yes. Well, that’s okay about it. Yeah. Yeah. That’s a joke, we’re not doing that. Not about the minivan at least. David Haddad, aka Mr. Branzino. Thank you so much for taking the time to join me today on Startup Dad. This was a fantastic discussion and hopefully helps a lot of dads get a little bit more comfortable in the kitchen and just get started. David Haddad: Appreciate the time. Just do it. Yeah, thank you. Thanks for having me. This was awesome. Adam Fishman: Thank you for listening to today’s conversation with David Haddad. AKA Mr. Branzino. If you enjoyed the show, please subscribe, share, and leave me a review on Apple or Spotify. It’ll help other people find this podcast. Startup Dad is a Fishman AF production with editing support from Tommy Heron. You can join a community of over 10, 000 subscribers and stay up to date on my thoughts on growth, product, and parenting by subscribing to the Fishman AF newsletter at www. fishman. com. AF newsletter.com. Thanks for listening. See you next week.