Gamed with some guys last night and one was branded as a "Pizza war criminal" for cutting his pizza this way. He claimed it made it easier to eat, plus you get 2 breadsticks out of it.
I find myself torn, because Pragmatic-Me likes it, but its asymmetrical so OCD-Me hates it
by monnok_11
33 Comments
Still a crime, but I don’t think it’s death sentence worthy
clever i suppose, but still insanity
Hmmm. It has purpose though. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
I have accepted this criminal behavior to be acceptable
Not hating
Still a crime, but I can see the logic behind it
Is it a personal pizza?
If so, then not guilty.
If shared with even one other person, then guilty on all counts.
3 months hard labor 2 month probation for this one
Not all heroes wear capes
Looks a bit undercooked to me. Then the hideous cut!
Acceptable if someone just wants a couple breadsticks, otherwise, no
Wrong thread
Pizza Dems will likely be all for this progressive display of pizza slicing however Pizza Republicans will balk at such blatant disregard to the tried and true old ways.
Yeah, this is a pizza crime. ***Particularly*** if that fucking criminal is taking the two biggest pieces. Selfish Bastard need to be denied first dibs for slices.
No attempt at pepperoni distribution, and I’m doubtful this is easier to eat without making a mess. The longer slices with toppings sloughing off looks structurally questionable.
5 years in the slammer and possibility of parole with good pizza behavior.
this is actually way better, don’t listen to what the “purists” say
This is basically a speeding ticket. Technically a crime but widely socially acceptable and it’s fun to do. No hard time, just a small fine
It’s also raw ?
Knee-jerk was “guilty,” but the more i look at it, the more i like it.
I vote not guilty
I mean, [the real crime isn’t the cut…](https://media1.tenor.com/m/CxaYusGvg7UAAAAC/raw.gif)
This… is… fine? It’s a 6 cut, just done weirdly. At the very worst, this is a fine, so not really illegal if your friend is rich.
Moderately criminal but definitely not the worst thing you could do.
Is there garlic dip? If so, I’ll let it slide.
When you work in a pizza place and cut pies all day, sometimes you have to do this to preserve your sanity.
No crime has been committed, but OP should seek therapy.
I support this!! This is so smart!!! I’m stealing this from now on and literally saving this post for reference for my next pizza!
It’s weird; guilty as charged.
I see 4 delicious looking slices and 2 breadsticks.
I see no crime.
Is that a Gameboy Advance? Holy throwback.
Oh my god this is genius
I’m in the same place you are; like yeah, it’s not how I would normally cut a pizza, but he makes a damn good point. I’m gonna go with not guilty here; if nothing else, just because he made a good argument for why he did it.
A minor offense, a misdemeanor, perhaps. I appreciate the ingenuity.