McConnell's Review No. 3: Should celebrities use their large platforms for good? Should they advocate for social justice to their millions of followers? Should they weigh in on one of the most important issues in the world today — namely the waning availability of premium ice cream? No matter where you stand in the political spectrum in today’s America, I think we ice cream fanatics can all appreciate the lengths that iconic singer-actress Barbra Streisand has gone to for us to bring McConnell’s discontinued Brazilian Coffee back to freezer shelves. This is a woman who has a fully functioning sweet shop in the faux mall of her mansion basement. She didn’t have to give voice to a legion of caffeinated sweet tooths in her recent memoir. But there she was talking about coffee ice cream — a lot, and even offered up her own easy recipe. It’s safe to say McConnell’s isn’t using marshmallows or instant coffee in their suite of coffee flavors, among the most sophisticated in the ice cream world. But they heard Babs loud and clear. Not only did they send her a personal shipment of Brazilian Coffee — the more mellow cousin of their gritty flagship java pint. They also brought it back to stores recently, so we can all live like a star for a day. Of course, sadly without our own subterranean bazaar featuring cobblestone paths, an antique doll shop and an archival fashion boutique. But how about that ice cream? It’s excellent, the standout of a quartet that also features Coffee, formerly Turkish Coffee, now just Coffee; a twist on a cafe drink with Hazelnut Latte; and one of the flavors in a collaboration with another iconic Southern California brand, See’s Candy. See’s Molasses Chips — which I suspect could be found in Barbra’s confectionery — bring one of the most delicious mix-ins that a coffee ice cream has ever met. Just be clear: That base is not Brazilian Coffee (these are all distinct bases, no recycling here). That one is enjoyed simply, without garnish, as Miss Streisand prefers. According to 2023’s “My Name is Barbra,” she took issue when a McConnell’s shop intruded on her “smooth as silk" ice cream with chocolate chips, and then later encouraged fans to ask McConnell’s for its permanent return. Alas, this current return is labeled as a limited release, so get it while you can. And thank Babs for raising her voice in service of great ice cream. Like we’ve seen, it can make a difference. Maybe we should call this the New Streisand Effect.

Coffee: I tried this one a few years back when it was known as Turkish Coffee. That provenance intrigued me. I thought maybe it would have some sort of spice. I had read Turkish coffee often has cardamom. However, here the name actual referred to the grind — an ultra-fine flour-like powder rather than regular coffee grounds. It took the name Coffee when the Brazilian version shifted to limited status and lost the need for differentiation. Even with its locational adjective stripped, Coffee brings powerhouse flavor and complexity, and a hint of bitterness, that feels like artisanal barista experience transported to a scoop shop. I don’t have the bean-loving palate to assess all of the lovely nuances I’m certain have been painstakingly curated by McConnell’s ice cream visionaries. But I certainly get the industrial strength caffeine hit thanks to the double punch of cold brew and espresso infused into the dairy base and all those tiny flecks of crushed espresso beans. Texturally, I’m not a fan of the grit — just like Barbra I prefer a smooth-as-silk experience. But I do certainly appreciate this. There’s no off-putting burnt notes. This is the kind of coffee you want when you’re hitting the books late or toiling over breathless dessert reviews for Reddit. Coffee level: 9; overall quality: 7.6/10

Brazilian Coffee: Now this is my type of coffee, more of a creamy crowd-pleaser but still fairly bold, none of the espresso bean grit. That said, I can see why that other coffee won the battle for single-name Diva status (Cher! Madonna!… Barbra?!) as this eats like a slightly fancier, perked-up version of my all-time favorite, Häagen-Dazs. You can’t beat the Coffee GOAT at its own game after all. For me, and I imagine many others, that specific flavor lives in my memory (misty, coffee-colored memories of the way we were eating ice cream…) McConnell’s wanted something all their own, and they have it with their flagship Coffee. I can’t think of another one quite of its intensity, complexity and quality combo. But this is the McConnell’s coffee ice cream I want. Maybe not a whole industrial freezer full like Ms. Streisand. Is it those Brazilian beans? H-D uses them, too, so I imagine they have a direct pathway to my taste buds. McConnell’s says it’s paying homage to the Mogiana region's labor-intensive growing methods and joining that with their prized Central Coast grass-fed milk. It’s an artisanal fusion of two stalwarts of agricultural tradition. But this one also feels a little more exclusive given the nature of its A-list return. The coffee level has gone up a notch, and so has the acidity and butterfat. This sits heavier on the spoon. Like Graeter’s there’s an impressive density here, a wonderfully creamy mouthfeel. It makes you want to enjoy it in bites rather than bowls. The H-D, by contrast, hits that ideal textural and flavor sweet spot of “I just need to have one more bite.” So, whether by merit or nostalgia, Häagen-Dazs still reigns supreme for me. Coffee level: 7.5; overall quality: 9/10

Coffee with Molasses Chips (See’s collection): I enjoyed this one last summer when I bought the See’s collection (which includes seven pints featuring the L.A. candy maker’s treats; most are excellent), but I liked it a lot more this time. The medium-roast coffee-infused base feels more welcoming and rounded — and I’m not sure if it’s because I’m tasting it next to other powerhouse pints, or because they have been a lot more generous with the fudge sauce this time. Of course, both times, those crunchy, airy Molasses Chips (both milk and dark here) are a standout. They shatter on your teeth (dentists beware), not unlike toffee pieces. But having tried the crunch bars that Ben & Jerry’s used in their flavor, these bring a chocolatey, caramelized snap, maybe a hint of toasted-sugar complexity from the molasses, while the B&J mix-ins conjured the taste sensation of an unwashed charcoal grill. Last time, I got a slight bitterness (either from the candy or the base) but I think the heavy hand of sweet fudge waved that away this time, just leaving a lovely mocha experience. Coffee level: 8; overall score: 8.8/10

Hazelnut Latte: This feels like a jar of Nutella where the tide has turned, and hazelnut has won the war for dominance. And where’s the coffee? Latte evokes a sweet, creamy drink with some sort of coffee notes and this pint gives me straight-up hazelnut, no chaser. Even the chocolate — usually a forceful presence in a McConnell’s pint (like the one above) – seems scared to assert itself, thanks to this bully hazelnut. While I do think they captured the nut perfectly — and hazelnut fans should scoop this up, no doubt — it’s not perfect for me. Nut flavors need strong companions or they’re just fatty and one-note. But I wasn’t sure if it was just vibes, maybe I’m not a fan of hazelnut’s solo work. So looking up the process on this one, it looks like they make their own house hazelnut butter. This is not extract or syrup. This is very high-quality work. Noted. But what happens here is McConnell’s usually sky-high butterfat (often upward of 18%) has been hijacked by nuts. I’ve been learning lots of interesting sciency things writing these reviews that I only half-pretend to understand — if only high school chem had a dairy week. Tasting Jeni’s House Coffee, I learned fat can coat individuals’ tongues in different ways and affect how we perceive flavor. And so I’m not perceiving any coffee really and the chocolate feels slightly ephemeral despite its visual appearance. I expected a creamy, nutty coffee-house delight. Instead I got what ate to me like a jar of frozen hazelnut spread. Coffee level: 1; overall score: 5.5/10

Final thought: One day I hope to score an invite to Ms. Streisand’s basement mall for a scoop of Brazilian coffee. I’d even settle for a treat from her popcorn maker or FroYo machine. I wouldn’t expect a parting gift, but since she does have a gift store, perhaps some of her pink glassware or vintage children’s shoes? Better yet, a pint to go from the Diva’s personal McConnell’s freezer. That Brazilian Coffee that unites us in sugary, caffeinated joy — if nothing else — proved the high point of my own tasting. In a one-bedroom apartment, sadly without a furrier, a jewelry store, not even a gift wrap room. If I were in a mocha sort of mood, I’d grab that See’s pint, while letting the latte linger a bit longer in the back of the freezer. And if I needed to do an impromptu long-haul trucking shift at 2 in the morning, I’d grab that high-octane Coffee. No longer Turkish Coffee. Just Coffee.

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COFFEE TALK
Follow along each week as I explore the wide world of coffee ice creams

WEEK 1 | Graeter’s: Vienna Coffee (9.3), Mocha Chocolate Chip (9.3), Caramel Macchiato (9.2)
WEEK 2 | Jeni’s: House Coffee (6.8), RIP: Coffee With Cream and Sugar (6.8), Cold Brew With Coconut Cream (7.8) 
WEEK 3 | Häagen-Dazs: Coffee (10), Coffee Chip (9.3) and Coffee Almond Toffee (9.5)
WEEK 4 | Talenti: Coffee Chocolate Chip Gelato (6.2), Cold Brew Coffee Sorbetto (6.5), Italian Tiramisu Layers (8.7)
WEEK 5 | Ben & Jerry’s: Coffee Coffee BuzzBuzzBuzz! (7.7), Coffee & Fudge Chip Scoop-apalooza (7.7), Coffee Toffee Bar Crunch (3.8), Honey Graham Latte (5.6/10), Mochaccino Chip (5.2/10); Mocha Mood Pie (2.9/10), Tiramisu Topped (8)
WEEK 6 | McConnell’s

Coming up:
WEEK 7 | Northwest coffee roundup: Salt & Straw Coffee and Love Nuts, Tillamook Coffee Almond Fudge, Umpqua Caramel Cold Brew and Espresso Madness, Alden’s Cold Brew Coffee, Crooked Spoon Espresso, Snoqualmie Iced Latte, New Seasons Mocha Chip, Zupan’s Latte Chip, Bonta Gelato Coffee Chip, Pinolo Gelato’s Tiramisu

☕ The McConnell's Coffee Quartet: TL;DR